Ages 3 and up ON HIATUS
by Impressionsguy
Summary: Johnathan is a teenage brony who orders a Rainbow Dash toy in the mail, when it arrives, he finds out that he got much more than what he paid for.
1. Chapter 1: The Arrival

**Author's note:** I've had this idea for a while now, since around the Christmas of 2016 to be exact. Anyway, I finally decided to start it up, hopefully people like it, what is this? I like to see it as "My Little Dashie" meets "Toy Story", this is meant to have more depth than my previous story, featuring dry wit over lighthearted comedy and will feature heartfelt moments. And now, without further ado, Ages 3 and up.

* * *

Chapter One: The Arrival

Hello, my name is Johnathan, Johnathan Reed. Who am I? I'm just your every day, normal, average, run of the mill high school senior I guess. I make decent grades, I have a couple friends, I even take part in the school band, percussion section. Now, I guess there's one not quite normal thing about me, I'm a brony. And that's right about where the conversation ends when I meet most people. They immediately think I'm just that brony stereotype that originated from the depths of Reddit or 4Chan when the show first started, the kind who has a pony suit in his closet and cuddles up to a Twilight Sparkle waifu pillow when the night gets lonely. No, no that wasn't me, nothing against those who do enjoy those things of course, they just aren't for me. I was just a casual fan of the show, I watched the series, I awkwardly stood in line with girls half my age and their mothers who stared at me disapprovingly at the movie theater for the movie, and at times I would dabble in reading the fan fiction. But that was all, I didn't collect, I didn't have any apparel, none of that. Well, I guess that was about to change, I did have my first piece of merchandise on it's way in the mail that I stumbled across on Amazon, it was on discount so I thought it might be nice. It was from this Guardians of Harmony line, I guess it was Hasbro's attempt at making action figures for the franchise. The Rainbow Dash figure enticed me as she was one of my favorite characters so I bought her- _it_ that night. It was kind of cute, came with little flight goggles and a little Tank figure to accompany her. I wasn't really sure what I'd do with it since I never took an interest in toys all that much in general so I had no place to display it, I'd probably have it on my nightstand or a little thing to fidget with at my desk. I guess I'd figure all that out soon, after all, this was the day it was supposed to arrive.

"Has the mail gotten here yet?" I asked my mother coming downstairs from my room.

"Should be, I haven't checked. Good morning to you too." She replied.

"Good morning Ma." I said giving her a kiss on the head as I passed by her to grab some coffee to start my morning.

"That's better." She said with a slight smirk. "So what's on your agenda for today?" She asked.

"I want to go see if my package arrived, then I"m probably going to get some of my calculous homework done for now, then I'll see where the day takes me." I said.

"Well, I hope you have fun with that." She said. "I'm still surprised you didn't want to come with us." What she was referring to was Muppecon, a weekend long festival dedicated to The Muppets, I don't know why she was surprised, I haven't liked them since I was six. But still, my parents loved them and so did my little brother.

"I'm sure you'll have plenty of fun without me." I said. "Tell William the Toad or whoever I said hello." I said while tightening the lid on my travel mug.

"That's not his name and you know it." She replied, defending that to her precious frog.

"I know." I said leaving the room, before I left I turned back. "His name's Jim, right?" I smirked before heading out the door.

"I love you." She shook her head, now alone in the kitchen.

As I walked down the road to the mailbox, I hummed along and looked around at the woods and farm house across the road. I was happy to live in a rural area, not many people lived nearby, it was quiet, and you could bury a body anywhere you wanted. I kid, I kid, well, you could, but it wasn't why I liked it here. I just enjoyed the serenity. It could be a pain sometimes, none of my friends were in walking distance, but I didn't mind much, I wan't connected with any of them, I happened to be a member of the group. I was kind of like most the significant other characters on Friends, I was technically in the group, but not friends with them, this of course without the benefits of being someone's significant other. Sorry, I tend to ramble. When I got to the mailbox, I turned the key and looked inside, all envelopes. I leafed through them.

"Bills, bills, chain mail... Never see that much as a letter anymore, and another bill." I sighed. "Great." I looked down as I turned around, down at my feet was a light brown shipping bag. I crouched down and picked it up. "Johnathan Reed of Passekeag New Brunswick, Canada." It was my package! I grabbed the rest of the mail and happily slammed the mailbox door. Package and mail in hand I made my way home.

"Mail's here!" I said setting the letters down on the table before running upstairs. When I shut the door I set the package down on the desk. I sat down and ripped open the bag and took out the box. Seems delivery treated it well, no rips on the card, the plastic blister the toy was in wasn't dented, and the figure itself looked great. Not that the packaging mattered really, I was going to tear it open anyway. Speaking of which. It was time I opened it. I tore off the cardboard and discarded it, I took out the accessories, which I put in the drawer in my nightstand as I had no use for them, except Tank, who I sat down on my desk before popping Rainbow Dash out of the plastic and took a look, the figure was a perfect representation of Rainbow Dash from the show. The front legs were posable at the top and at the knee, the wings could move, hind legs moves at the flank, the tail could move, and the head went up and down and side to side. It was a nice little figurine, a great representation of one of my favorite characters.

"Cute." I said setting the figure down on my desk, angling one leg with a slight bend as if resting one hoof. As I left the room I turned back and glanced at it. I chuckled imagining a little tiny Rainbow Dash flying around my room, the idea made me laugh. I glanced back once more and shut the door.

A few hours later

"Now you're absolutely sure you don't want to come?" My dad asked before shutting the trunk of the van. "Door price for admission isn't too bad."

"He prob'ly just wants the house to himself for the weekend." Bobby, my little brother said, already dressed up in his Animal costume, they were all going in costume, my dad was Sgt. Floyd Pepper and my mom was Janice, I guess they were members of the rock band on The Muppet Show, I couldn't remember.

"I'm sure." I said, ignoring my brother.

"Alright, if you need anything, just call." My dad said.

"And the neighbor's phone number is on the fridge, and your grandmother, let's see, 9-11, who else..." My mom said.

"Hon, he's 18." My dad reassured her. "He'll be fine, he's spent the weekend on his own." He turned to me. "No parties, and if you do, just have them cleaned up before we get back." He gave me a hug before getting in the van. "By Johnny, love you."

"Love you too dad." I said. "Love you mom! See ya squirt!" I called to my mom and Bobby.

"See you Monday afternoon sometime." He said before shutting the door. "Alright gang! Let's get moving right along!" He said before cranking the music, as the van left I could hear the three of them singing along loudly to "Movin' Right Along" from the first Muppet movie. I chuckled watching them leave before heading back inside. Now, if I were most boys my age, the first thing I'd do would be to call up half the school and throw a raging party. Thankfully for the property value of the land I wasn't like that. Instead I put two slices of bread in the toaster and made a sandwich. Then, I called up my friend and we talked on the phone while playing the latest "Call to Warfare" game online.

"So then, they were all like 'Come on Johnathan, come with us!' I mean, I feel bad for disappointing them, but I'm just not interested in spending the whole weekend surrounded by puppets." I explained to my friend, Matthew.

"You'd rather spend it surrounded by Rainbow Sparkle and Apple Pie or whoever those pony characters are." He joked, luckily for me, when I told him about me being a brony he was cool with it, he still zings me for it, but that's what friends do. "Watch out for that guy on your left." He warned. I shot at the player he warned me about.

"No more trouble out of him, until he respawns anyway." I said. "And I'll have you know it's Rainbow _Dash_ And Apple _jack_."

"Whatever man." He laughed. "Ready for that calc test next week?" He asked.

"I'm about as ready for that as you seem to be ready for that sniper up there." I said.

"What?" He asked, suddenly there was a fit of swearing from his end and a notification popped up on the screen saying he had been KIA. "Don't let anyone loot me, I need to respawn." He said.

"Fine, I'll guard you." I sighed going over to the virtual corpse.

"You'd better study up for the test then if you're only that ready." He warned me. "You don't want to get sniped by a bad grade."

"I've already been accepted into college Matt." I scoffed. "Everyone uses the last semester of high school just to coast by till you graduate."

"I guess you've got a point, you were a real dummy picking it for your last semester." He said.

"I couldn't help it! First semester was all booked!" I replied. "What are you doing in the second semester class?" I asked.

"I wanted to do Outdoor Pursuits in first and the only period was also the calc period, then they wedged me in this one." He explained.

"Yeah, Outdoor Pursuits, so you can go to the Yale Institute of taking hikes." I quipped.

"Art class, so you can go to the Prometheus School of drawing ponies." He rebuttaled.

"Got me there." I chuckled.

"Speaking of which, I don't think Marie would be too thrilled about your little hobby." He said.

"Why would I care?" I asked.

"Maybe because you like her, a lot." He explained.

"No I don't." I said.

"You do! I see you in class, you stare more at her than you used to stare at the middle school cafeteria sloppy Joes." He laughed.

"That's a lie, and I never liked those either, they were icky."

"Is that what you say about her too?" He asked.

"Oh shut up." I said angrily. He was right though, I did have a pretty big crush on this one girl in a few of my classes, Marie. She was smart, pretty, kind, she was just overall completely wonderful, but at the same time I knew that she would never give me the time of day and even then, this coming fall we'd be off to college and I'd never see her again anyway, at this point I didn't see why I should bother telling her how I felt.

"Whatever man." He said. Before I could respond, I heard a loud noise from my room, it sounded like something hitting my window. I stopped and listened.

"Ping!"

"Ping!"

"Ping!" There it was, it just kept happening, I had no idea what was going on in there but I figured it was about time I found out.

"Man? You still there?" Matt asked.

"Yeah, I've just... I've gotta go for a second." I said. "Chat later." I said hanging up the phone. I walked up the stairs, curious about whatever the sound coming from my room was, it sounded as if a bird kept flying into my window. I creaked open my door and looked inside, at first I couldn't believe my eyes. It was my Rainbow Dash figure, she was... flying!

"C'mon!" She said angrily flying into my window once again, oblivious to the fact I could see her, Tank however, did notice me. With his propeller he flew up and tried to get her attention.

"What do you want?" She asked. "I told you I won't leave you behind, what is it?" He kept gesturing towards me. "Is something behind me?" She asked. She turned around to see what was behind her, when she saw that I was watching her she gasped and fell from where she was hovering onto my desk, once again motionless, Tank did the same. At first I thought I was just seeing things, as one would think after seeing something like that. I walked over to the figure and picked it up, examining it once more, I was sure it had just been flying through the air, but how?

"I saw you move, I know you did." I said to the now inanimate action figure. Maybe I didn't, maybe I'm going insane. I looked at the window, there was a small dent in it from where she- it. Where it had flown into the window, I ran my finger along the window, feeling the little chip in the glass. There it was, proof. Proof I wasn't insane, I couldn't have just been seeing things, there was physical evidence of what I just saw. "Listen you. I saw you, you can't just act like I didn't." I said. I guess it could, nothing was happening. "I guess you can." I muttered setting her-... _it_ down again and leaving the room. This time, I shut the door and stood beside it, waiting, I shuffled my feet a few times to imitate stepping away. After a few seconds of silence, I heard the tapping once again. Aha! I wasn't crazy! I creaked open the door to check, sure enough, there it was, my Rainbow Dash action figure was flying about, charging at the window.

"Aha!" I exclaimed. "I knew it!" I said moving towards her.

"Oh no." She muttered to herself, seeing that I was moving towards her. She froze again and crashed onto the desk.

"Nope. Nuh-huh. Not this time." I grabbed the figure. "I saw you. You flew, you talked." I said directly to it. "Come on, I'm not so bad, I'm not gonna hurt you." I pleaded, okay, this was sad. I was pleading to a toy. "You don't wanna talk?" I asked. "Maybe I'll make you." I said, I looked down at the small inanimate Tank. "Sorry pal, if everything goes according to plan, she'll be okay." I said leaving the room with the toy. I went down to the kitchen and fiddled around in the junk drawer. "There they are." I grabbed the matches and the scotch tape. my next stop was Bobby's room to grab one of his firework rockets. "You like flying do you?" I asked. "Well you're about to fly alright." Truthfully I didn't want to do this, but I did want answers and I was prepared to get them, and so, outside, I taped the figure to the rocket a la Sid Phillips and angled it skyward. I fumbled with the match box and took one out.

"I don't want to do this!" I said holding the matchstick. I said nothing for about ten seconds just staring at it, I struck the match and slowly crept it towards the fuse. "I really don't!" I said. I held the match about an inch from the fuse. I closed my eyes as I slowly moved it closer until I heard a voice.

"Why in Celestia's name are you doing this!?" The small and angry voice said. I opened my eyes to see the figure, once again who was alive and talking. Her eyes glared angrily at me and she was struggling to get out of the tape.

"You are alive!" I said in astonishment.

"No duh." The toy growled. "Now take this tape off. Now!" She ordered.

"I'll take it off." I said. "As soon as I ask a few questions."

"Let me start with a question." It- _She_ said. "Get me out of this thing!"

"That's not a question." I said.

"I don't care!" She said angrily.

"If I take this off, what are you going to do?" I asked.

"Well, after I buck you square in the eye, I'm going to get Tank and then we're out of here, that's what!" She spat.

"That doesn't create a very compelling case for me to let you go, after all, why should I?" I asked.

"You could see it as common courtesy after nearly launching me into space!" She sneered.

"I wasn't going to do it." I told her. "I just needed proof I wasn't going mad."

"Well now you have it!" She said. "Now lemme go so I can be on my merry way."

"No." I said. "I'm not going to let you just fly off. First of all, it is a dangerous world out there, and you, in case you haven't noticed are quite small."

"Newsflash." She sneered.

"Second, you belong to me, I bought you." I explained. "So whatever I say goes!" She just sneered at me.

"You had to go there huh?" She sighed. "Fine. Can you at least take me inside? Then let me go?" She asked.

"That I can do." I said going inside, holding the rocket with her taped to it. When I got inside and made sure all the windows in the house were shut, I carefully removed the tape from her. She immediately started flying around, doing flips in the air, gleeful to have her mobility back. She then noticed me again and flew right up to my face. After a second of angry eye contact, she bucked me square between the eyes, luckily, not actually in one like she told me. She then flew back up to my room to comfort Tank, who was probably terrified after the past few minutes.

"I suppose I deserved that." I muttered rubbing between my eyes, for a plastic figure she sure can kick! I decided it would be best to leave her alone, so I decided I'd get back to playing my game for a bit before I prepared dinner. After a little while of playing I turned it off to go prepare dinner, when the room was silent once more, I heard noise coming from my room again, but this was different, it sounded more like... crying. Curious, I made my way upstairs and listened through the crack of the door.

*sniff* "I don't know Tank..." I heard her say sadly. "I don't know what's going to happen to us..." *sniff* "I mean, you saw what happened today, who know's what could happen next?" She sighed. "This isn't what I hoped, this wasn't the plan..." She said before sniffling again. I slowly opened the door and came in. "Oh... It's you..." She said with sadness and some anger.

"Yeah... it is." I said. "Look... I just wanted to say that I was sorry I got so harsh." I apologized. "I shouldn't have done that."

"No kidding." She said, hiding her face.

"Listen, I understand if you don't want to speak to me." I said. "I just, I don't know what came over me, a heat of the moment type thing." I said.

"Mhm." She said without looking at me.

"Look, I'm about to make some dinner..." I began.

"I don't eat, genius." She said. "I _am_ a toy."

"I... I know." I said. "I jst wondered, I don't know, maybe you'd like to talk or something during dinner?"

"You gonna strap me to a rocket to get me to talk there too?" She asked sharply.

"No... No." I shook my head.

"So you aren't going to force me to do it?" She asked.

"No." I said. She hesitated for a moment.

"I... I guess." She said hesitantly. I went to pick her up but she stopped me. "I can fly by myself." She said flapping her plastic wings, hovering behind me as I walked down the stairs into the kitchen, all through preparing dinner she and I were silent. As I sat down and began to eat, she landed on the table and walked around it, looking at the various objects that were twice her size and more. After a while, she laid down on the table and let out a small sigh.

"Is something bothering you?" I asked.

"You wouldn't believe the day I had." She said. "Believe it or not, I had my life ruined and I was strapped to a rocket all in the same day."

"Hm?" I asked.

"Are you deaf?" She asked. "My life has been ruined!" She got up angrily.

"How has it been ruined?" I asked. "You've got a place to live, decent living space, you aren't stuck in a box, what could possibly ruin a toy's life?" I asked.

"You!" She pointed her small plastic hoof at me. "You ruined it!" She said furiously. "I... I heard... I heard about..." She began, sniffling.

"You heard about what?" I asked.

"I heard about... people like you." She said.

"What do you mean, people like me?" I asked.

"You know!" She growled. "You man-child type people who obsess over a little girls show!" She explained. "The type who creepily ogle at cartoon horses and do just ungodly things to plush toys!" She blurted.

"What on Earth makes you think I'm like that?" I asked.

"Because I know all about your kind!" She said. "Your kind was responsible for what happened to my friend!"

"What?" I asked.

"Ugh." She groaned. "I guess I have to tell you everything."

* * *

Shipping Warehouse, about a month ago

"I can't believe it Twilight!" Rainbow said happily through her package, "You're shipping out tomorrow, how are you feeling miss order 8105253?" She asked.

"I'm excited!" The Twilight figure smiled through her package. "I sure hope she likes me."

"She'll love you Twi! Don't worry about it!" Rainbow reassured her.

"You think so?" She asked.

"Sure!" Rainbow nodded. "I'm just bummed I'm not going with you."

"I'm sure your new owner will love you too when you find her." Twilight smiled.

"I sure hope so." Rainbow Dash smiled. The next day, Twilight and her said their final goodbyes and Twilight was shipped off, days passed, Rainbow Dash wondered how Twilight was doing. One day, the box Rainbow Dash's package sat in opened up and another box was put in, it was Twilight!

"Twilight? What are you doing back here?" Rainbow Dash asked. Twilight however, was in tears.

"Rainbow Dash... It was nothing like you said." She said. "He hated me."

"What? He? He hated you?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"He hated me, I guess it was something about my paint or something, I don't know... there were others Rainbow Dash, so many others there, some still in their boxes, others strewn about, it was terrifying, when he wasn't in the room the told me about the sick things he'd do... it was terrible." She said crying.

"Twilight... I'm... I'm sorry... Don't worry though! Maybe you'll be shipped out again! And this time it'll be everything you've dreamed of!" Rainbow Dash suggested. Before Twilight could respond, the box opened again and a hand grabbed Twilight's box.

"Hey Wilson! This the one you said was returned for the error?" The warehouse worker asked.

"Should be!" The other worker called. "I marked the package, is there a mark?"

"Yeah!" The worker holding Twilight called back.

"Yeah, may as well toss it!" Wilson replied.

"You got it!" The worker said.

"Twilight! No!" Rainbow Dash cried out as the cardboard was once again shut on the large box, leaving her in the dark, her best friend's fate decided over a matter she couldn't control, all because of that man. But Rainbow Dash decided that it wouldn't happen to her, she wasn't allowing herself to have the same fate as her friend. She was going to find a little girl who loved her, what she always wanted, what Twilight would have wanted. And if her new owner wasn't who she was looking for, she wouldn't rest until she found the right one.

* * *

Back in the present

"Oh my God..." I said sympathetically. "I'm sorry..."

"Well there you go." She said. "If it weren't for him, she'd still be around." She looked down sadly before turning to look at me. "But hey, not that you'd understand, you look at us and think 'hey, there's a hundred million out there just like them, what's it matter?' Yeah. I know that for a fact, why don't you go ahead and return me too huh? Start over with another one? Since I'm so replaceable and everything, we all are, all my friends. Guess you have it lucky." She said angrily before flying away.

I sat there in silence, yikes, I really got more than I paid for here. I felt terrible for her, I had no idea what she had been through, now things were starting to make sense, her resentment toward me, she was... scared. She was scared of me, she was scared that I would be all the things she had heard, she was worried she'd have a similar fate. Now it all made sense, well, as much sense as this whole thing could make after all. Truthfully I was still coming to terms with the fact that my toy was alive, let alone that my toy was alive and hated me. What was I going to do? I didn't want her to feel trapped and scared, I didn't want her to hate me, what was I going to do? I sighed finishing my dinner and putting the dishes in the dishwasher. Then, I had an idea. I made my way up to my room once more, I figured that she'd be there, sure enough, I was right. She was lying down on the windowsill, sniffling tearfully as Tank stood by her. When she heard me come in, she turned and looked at me.

"They still accept returns after being taken out of the package." She said sadly. "Shipping envelopes are pretty cheap, you did a number on the one I came in." She stood up. "I can grab my accessories, I saw where you put them." She flew over to my nightstand and opened the door. I said nothing, I walked to the window and opened it, nice and wide. The cool breeze of the May afternoon started to blow through. She stopped and looked at me as I stood, looking out the window.

"I'm sorry." I said. "I'm sorry that it was me. I'm sorry about what happened to your friend, and I'm sorry for what I nearly did to you."

"What are you doing?" She asked.

"I'm letting you go." I said. "You want that little girl who loves you, right? Well, I'm letting you find her." She flew up to the windowsill again, letting the breeze blow against her. She looked back at me.

"Why are you doing this?" She asked.

"Well. I didn't want you to be sad, long and the short of it." I explained. "You weren't happy with me. You were scared, sad, and you hate me, I heard you crying up here, I just thought that it would be cruel of me to force you to stay somewhere that you don't want, so I'm giving you a chance to find the home that you want." I concluded.

"Wow..." She began. "I didn't think that this would happen... Thank you." She said, forming something close to smile.

"You're welcome. I just want you to be happy." I nodded. "I'll be back to close the window later, goodbye Rainbow Dash." I said before leaving the room. Rainbow Dash looked out into the wide open world outside the window, Tank stood by her side and began to propel himself out the window. Rainbow Dash just stood there for a moment, all she had wanted all day was to leave, but then, after that conversation, she wasn't sure, she wasn't ready for that kindness. She was unsure.

About twenty minutes later, I came back to my room to close the window, when I got there, sure enough, she was nowhere to be seen, almost as if the day had never even happened. "Figured." I said to myself, shutting the window. I sighed and looked down at the box she had came in and chuckled. "Won't forget today, not any time soon that's for sure." I said turning to leave, on my dresser by the door much to my surprise, stood Rainbow Dash and Tank.

"Hi." She said slowly. I looked at her curiously.

"What? Why didn't you leave?" I asked.

"Well..." She began. "I feel like... Maybe... _maybe..._ I was wrong about you. I judged you a little too quickly. I never got to see what you were really like before assuming the worst, I do have a history of that." She chuckled nervously. "So, I've decided to stay. At least until I can see who you really are." She said. I looked at her and smiled.

"Thank you." I smiled.

"Just until I can get to know you. Then, all bets are off." She said with a slight grin.

"I can take that." I nodded.

* * *

 _So that is our introduction to Ages 3+, I have some big plans for this story so I hope people like it, frankly I'm glad I took a year to write Equestria's New Comedian first so I could get a little practice before attempting something with more depth. Until the next chapter!_


	2. Chapter 2: Ice Breakers

**Author's note:** I'm glad that so far this story is being enjoyed, I hope you like where this goes. This chapter is a little more lighthearted than it's predecessor, and focuses on the friendship of Johnathan and Rainbow Dash beginning to grow by them getting to know each other. Also, interestingly enough. As this story is about getting a toy in the mail, Spitfire and Soarin' from the same line as Rainbow Dash in the story just arrived in the mail! They accompany her along with my other figures nicely, Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Queen Chrysalis, and Cheese Sandwich. If anyone at Hasbro is reading this, keep that line up huh? Big Mac would be nice.

* * *

Chapter Two: Ice breakers

Part of me still expected to wake up and find out that all the events of the day before had been a dream, sure enough, they weren't. My family was still away, my package did arrive, and the contents were alive and flying around my room. As I woke up and rolled out of bed, Rainbow Dash noticed me.

"Well look who's finally awake." She smirked, hovering about five feet away. "Was wondering when you'd be up."

"Good morning to you too." I yawned standing up. "How long have you been up?" I asked.

"Couple hours now." She said. "Didn't want to wake you, you were sleeping like a baby, a big, kind of grumpy baby." I cocked my eyebrow and looked at her.

"That's not what I look like when I sleep, and don't watch me sleep. Anyway, confinement time is over, feel free to explore." I opened the door and went downstairs to make breakfast, I heard the sound of little wings flapping behind me. Rainbow Dash eventually was hovering over my shoulder when she caught up to me.

"So like, who are you?" She asked. "You never told me your name."

"My name is Johnathan." I told her.

"Nice name." She said.

"Thanks, got it for my birthday." I snickered. The conversation was pretty much over there, I was silent, she was silent, the whole thing was still a little awkward I guess. I prepared my coffee and buttered some toast and sat down to eat. Rainbow Dash just hovered around the kitchen, looking around at things, pictures on the fridge, recipe books, she stopped and posed looking at her reflection on the toaster. I couldn't help but chuckle a little watching that.

"Something funny?" She asked me hearing my snicker.

"Yeah, you." I said. "I was just watching you and the toaster."

"So that's what this is, I just thought you had a tiny mirror." She said.

"Nope." I snickered.

"Make you feel good? Making fun of somepony because they aren't used to their surroundings?" She said sarcastically.

"One of my favorite activities." I smirked.

"Oh quiet." She said. "Tell me about yourself."

"You want me to be quiet or to tell you about myself?" I said with a sarcastic tone.

"Okay smarty-pants." She groaned. "You know what I meant."

"Alright alright, well, let's see..." I began. "I'm in high school, on my last year actually. I like to draw, I can play percussion." I explained.

"What's that?" She asked.

"It's a fancy word for drums." I summed it up.

"Oh, cool!" She said. "What else?"

"Well, I've got a mom, a dad, and a little brother." I said. "They're away for the weekend. I've got a couple friends, Matt and Carla."

"Girlfriend? You're a teenager with a pony toy so probably not." She smirked.

"That pony toy can be sent back, I've got the stamps." I sneered at her remark. "But no, no girlfriend."

"Boyfriend?" She asked.

"I like girls." I said quickly. "Anyway, new topic." She chuckled, seeing see struck a nerve. "What about you?" I asked.

"What's to know? I'm a toy." She said. "My purpose is to be played with by a kid until they get tired of me, break, or loose me."

"Well when you put it that way it's pretty depressing." I remarked.

"That's my lot in life." She said.

"Yep, it's not a lot but it's your life." I joked.

"Ha." She said dryly.

"You know, I gotta admit." I began. "When I first saw that you were a toy come to life, I figured you'd act a bit different." I said.

"How so?" She asked.

"Well, your personality is still very much that of Rainbow Dash from the cartoon, but I thought that you'd-"

"Think I actually was _the_ Rainbow Dash?" She asked, taking the words right from my mouth.

"Yeah pretty much." I nodded, taking a sip of coffee.

"Watch Toy Story as a kid didja?" She asked.

"That's where I got all my toys-to-life knowledge from." I nodded. "Wait, you spent the first half of your existence in a warehouse, in a box, how would you even know what that was?" I asked.

"Our box was next to a box of Buzz Lightyears, nice guys, little too macho for my taste." She explained, I guess her ego is enough, she looks more into someone pathetic to even the scales.

"Ah." I nodded. "That explains it, so what are the rules?" I asked.

"Huh?" She asked.

"What can come to life and what can't?" I asked.

"Okay first off, we don't come to life, we pretend to be objects." She corrected. "And to answer your question its toys, dolls, plush toys, things like that, then you've got your run of the mill bust, statue, or garden gnome, nope." She shook her head.

"And why's that?" I asked.

"I dunno, why are you alive?" She asked.

"Touche." I nodded. "So like, no eating or drinking?" I asked.

"None. Where would it go right?" She asked rhetorically.

"Good point." I said. Suddenly, my phone buzzed. I checked the message on the screen, it was an unknown number, 555-5469 to be exact. The text read: "Hey Johnathan! trying 2 study for that test this week and I can't understand it! I know UR pretty smart, wanna study w/ me sometime? It's Marie BTW." No way.

"No way..." I gasped. Rainbow Dash looked quizzically at me.

"What?" She asked.

"Oh uh... Nothing." I said. "Sure! Would love to... where and when? Also, how did you get my digits?" I texted back. I saved the number in my phone and put it away in my pocket.

"Didn't look like nothing." Rainbow Dash said.

"It's nothing that concerns you." I replied.

"Aw c'mon, who am I gonna tell?" She asked. "Listen, we're trying to be friends, right? Friends share with friends!" She haggled.

"Just... a friend of mine." I said. She didn't believe me, I could tell by the look on her little plastic face.

" _Right._ " She said sarcastically. "Look, don't ever credit me on being the brightest, but I can tell when someone is lying."

"I'm telling the truth, Marie is a friend of mine." I said.

"Is she?" She smirked. "You didn't tell me about her when you told me about your other friends." She said slyly.

"Must've slipped my mind." I said.

"Mhm, sure." She said. Suddenly my phone buzzed again. I checked to see what it said.

"Digits? R U from the 90's? LOL! And I got UR # from Clara, knew U 2 were friends. How about Ms. Cooper's room Tuesday lunch? :)" She texted. My silly, juvenile, love-struck heart beat rapidly.

"Works for me!" I replied, putting the phone away.

"What's that sound?" Rainbow Dash asked. I looked at her quizzically.

"What sound?" I asked.

"Sounds kinda like a 'ka-thud!' 'ka-thud!' Don't you hear it?" She smirked, flying up to about an inch from my chest. "There it is!" She pointed at my chest, in which sat my hard beating heart.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"Your heart! Ticker! Blood tomato!" She exclaimed, blood tomato's a new one...

"Oh, that?" I looked down. "Too much caffeine I guess."

"Yeah right." She snickered.

"Look, it's really nothing you need to-" My phone buzzed. "Hold that thought."

"Gr8! C U then! :)" The text read. My heart beat more and more.

"What ever happened to just spelling out words?" Rainbow Dash asked, looking over my shoulder. I quickly put my phone away. "What?" She asked.

"Is it wrong for me to want things private?" I asked harshly.

"Dude, I'm a _toy._ Who am I gonna tell?" She asked.

"It's not about who you'll tell, I already have Matt and Clara bugging me about this, I don't need you doing it too." I explained.

"So it _is_ a crush!" She grinned. I looked at her with frustration in my eyes and sighed through my nose.

"Yes, okay?" I said. "But it doesn't matter, we're going our separate ways this fall."

"So? What's that got to do with anything?" She asked.

"Huh?" I asked.

"I'm just sayin', what's the problem with enjoying something while you can? Let the future be a problem later!" She said. I stopped and thought for a moment, she did have a point I'll admit.

"You've got a point." I nodded. "Well, better get started on the dishes." I looked over at the pile of dishes in the sink. "After I finish up, want to go for a walk or something?" I asked.

"You trust me not to fly off?" She asked.

"You said you wanted to get to know me some, I doubt you've seen enough." I explained.

"I don't know, you seem pretty basic." She smirked.

"I resent that." I sneered.

After I finished up the dishes and put them away, I went out to the porch and got my shoes on. Tank was in the middle of a nap, I guess even toys need those... so it was just Rainbow and I. Rainbow soon joined me on the porch. I breathed in heavily through my nose, smelling the fresh air.

"Ahh... sure is nice huh?" I asked. "Wait, can you smell?" I asked.

"Yeah, weird how that stuff works." She breathed in and exhaled slowly. "You're right. It's nice." She remarked.

"Walks are nice, the cool breeze with the warm sun, it's perfect, don't you agree-" Before I could turn and finish that sentence, she zoomed off.

"Yeah! Wa hoo! Alright!" She cheered making loops in the air and flying about, at first I thought she was bolting off, but then I realized that she was only staying in about the same area of twenty feet, not moving forward. I looked up at her, it made me feel good to see her happy, she had been better this morning than the day before, but this is the happiest I've seen her.

"Having fun?" I called.

"I wasn't made with wings for nothing!" She said happily.

"I can see that." I chuckled watching her do tricks in the air, as I began to walk, she followed, flapping her wings behind me. "So what's it like, being able to fly?" I asked.

"It's great! One of the best things ever!" She flew around happily.

"Sure looks fun, you know, I used to wish I could fly." I admitted.

"I used to too... then I remembered I could! Ha!" She looped around.

"Gee, thanks for that." I said. "Nothing like rubbing it in when you can do something someone else can't." I said dryly.

"You have enough perks of being a human, lemme have this huh?" She asked, flying around my shoulders.

"How could I take it away? Pluck your wings out? I'm not that cruel." I said.

"You did strap me to a rocket." She murmured.

"I see you're the type to forgive and forget..." I said sarcastically.

"I forgive, but I don't forget." She replied.

"Smart." I said, nodding at her. "Oh boy. land in my hand." I said remarking at an approaching car.

"What?" She asked.

"Just do it!" I said, when she did, I closed my hand, hardly revealing the toy pony. Not that I was ashamed to have a toy pony of course, but because I wanted to keep her being alive a secret. When the truck passed by, I released my grasp and she flew back up, coughing and gagging.

"Little warning next time! You have sweaty hands!" She gagged.

"Sorry, I'll give better warning next time, I just, I think it's best that-" I was cut off.

"Best nobody else finds out I'm a living thing huh?" She asked.

"When you put it that way I sound like an ass." I said.

"You do, it's true, but I get it." She nodded.

"Good, I'm sorry, it's just that I don't want my family freaking out." I said.

"Yeah totally." She nodded. "I understand."

"Thanks." I said. "So... how far back do you remember?"

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"Like, you clearly remember living in a box, but do you remember anything else?" I asked.

"Oh, well, yeah. I remember somethings, not a lot. See, my earliest memory was when they finished putting my together I guess, I was in a factory, hundreds of others just like me surrounded me. It was weird, then, hundreds of memories I don't even remember living flooded my head, those were everything that Rainbow Dash did on the TV show. And I guess I have her personality and voice... and name. But I knew I wasn't really her from the start, it just wasn't possible." She told me.

"I see." I said, I definitely couldn't tell her I understood, what person can say that they understand a story like that?

"What about you, how far back do you remember?" She asked.

"I remember about as far back as when I was five years old. Everything before then is kind of fuzzy." I admitted.

"How old are you now?" She asked.

"I'm eighteen." I said.

"Eighteen huh? Lucky." She said, before sighing again. "That sounds like an eternity when you're a disposable item." Wow, this whole 'being a toy sucks' thing was really bumming me out.

"Be that as it may, I've heard tell of some toys that have lived for generations, some that outlived their owners even." I tried to cheer her up.

"Yeah but... They live in their boxes or in museums, what kind of life is that, you know?" She asked, I couldn't help but agree.

"I can see your point." I nodded. "Sorry I brought it up."

"Eh, you're just curious." She pardoned me. "So Johnathan, what do you do for fun?" She asked.

"Play video games, and sometimes I draw." I told her.

"Cool." She nodded.

"How about you?" I asked.

"Well, because I'm who I am I like to fly and do tricks and stuff." She explained.

"Not much say in that stuff huh?" I asked.

"Nope." She shook her head. "But I don't mind, it's fun!" She said before bolting around through the air.

"Sure looks it." I said, suddenly I had an idea, but I had to put it into effect later. "Say, maybe we should head on back." I said.

"Really?" She sounded disappointed.

"Yeah, but we can go for another walk tomorrow, maybe even later today." I bargained.

"Well okay." She said turning around with me. "Race ya!" She started to speed off.

"No fair!" I called, running after her.

* * *

Later that day

"So, this button is to accelerate, and this is to brake, this ones to steer." Rainbow Dash was interested in what video games were, so I decided to start her off with a racing game, Antonio Kart. A classic in racing games based off the Super Antonio Bros. franchise.

"This shouldn't be too tough." She said confidently starting the race. I played with her to give her someone to race against, but I took it easy on her, I don't mean to brag, but I'm pretty good. She was playing as the main character, Antonio, I selected the brother character, Stefano. Normally I was always Antonio, but I made an exception for today. She got good pretty quick, considering the obvious disadvantage with her diminutive stature. She drove over one of the many cubes on the road, giving her an item to use.

"What do I do?" She asked.

"Press this button." I showed her.

"Will do!" She nodded, and like that, my character was zapped with a lightning bolt and shrunk. "Ha!" She laughed. "Who's the tiny one now?" She laughed passing me.

"Hardy har har." I said dryly. "Yeah, well, looks like someone who's blue and flies is gonna be taken down by something that's blue and flies!" I laughed releasing the infamous blue turtle shell to ruin her 1st place position.

"Aw come on!" She said angrily. "You've got to be kidding!"

"I do not kid." I said with a satisfied tone. "I know you said you don't eat, but you're about to eat something, my dust!" I trash talked. Her skills had developed rapidly, she was now about as good as an average player.

"You'd better watch yourself! I'll beatcha!" She said.

"Yeah sure, even though I'm about to cross the finish line." I smirked. "Three... two... one... I win!" I boasted.

"Yeah yeah, I want a rematch!" She demanded.

"Some other time, you can keep playing, maybe get good huh?" I snickered. "I've got something to work on." I said getting up and putting the controller down.

"Fine, but when you get back you're going down!" She hollered.

"I'm sure." I chuckled, heading out to the work shed, it had the materials I needed for the little idea I had. Wood? Check. Paints? Check. Hammer and nails? Check. Wire? Check. Good, let's get started. A few hours later I was just about done, and pretty proud of what I had accomplished. I had made a nice runway and flying obstacle course, with loops to fly through and everything. After I leave the paint dry for a little I'd show it to her. I decided to head back in and see what she was up to.

"About time you got back! Come on, I wanna give you a kick in the butt at this game!" She said to me as I came in.

"We'll see what you've picked up." I said sitting down next to her picking up the controller. "Where are we racing?" I asked.

"Right here. My best track." She said, selecting Bruiser's Castle. Oooh, a good one.

"You're going down, pony." I taunted.

"You're going down, brony." She replied. And the race was on. There was one little trick I never let her in on, the speed boost at the beginning, so I used that to my advantage. I got a good start ahead of her, and held that for about half the lap, until of course she zapped me down again.

"You've got to be kidding!" I growled.

"I'm beating yooouuu." She sang happily.

"Not for long!" I said angrily. "You're taking a trip to pound town!"

"Where'd you learn your trash talk? The academy of lame trash talk?" She snickered.

"Yeah, well where'd you learn your... shut up." I grumbled.

"Someone grumpy because their losing to a toy?" She chuckled happily.

"Not for long, get shelled!" I shot shells at her, setting her back and letting me pass her.

"That the best you got, shells?" She asked.

"That the best you got, losing?" I replied smugly.

"Get bent!" She growled.

"Where'd you learn that?" I asked.

"I think you said it once when you were playing games down here." She said without breaking concentration.

"I'd believe that." I replied as we kept racing.

"Here, catch this!" She threw a bomb that blew up next to my character, stalling the car and letting her pass.

"Oh come on!" I said angrily, we were on the last lap now and I was losing.

"What's a matter? Is someone a sore loser?" She smirked.

"I still have the rocket from yesterday." I smirked back.

"You wouldn't." She said.

"You've got me there." I nodded.

"Not only that, but I've got you here, I win!" She said happily crossing the finish line.

"Dammit." I put the controller down with frustration. I got up and shut off the TV.

"Hey! Come on, another race!" She pleaded.

"Later, come with me, I've got a surprise." I said leading her outside.

"What is it?" She asked.

"You'll see." I told her. Once we got outside, I told her to wait on the porch and I went out to the garage. I put a sheet over the flying arena and brought it out.

"What is it?" She asked. "Please tell me it's a three car garage with my own Corvette."

"Tone down the sarcasm huh?" I said. "It's a little something I made for you." I pulled the sheet back and revealed the little arena. She flew up to it and looked at it.

"Whoa... is this a... flight training arena?" She asked.

"Sure is!" I said proudly. "You said you liked flying and doing tricks, so I made you a little flight zone, it's got a runway, loops to do flips through, hope you like it." I smiled.

"I... I love it!" She smiled, taking off and flying through the loops, doing little tricks. Laughing as she flew around and around.

"Glad you like it." I grinned a little. "I'll bring it inside so you can play with it in my room."

"Thank you!" She said happily.

"You're welcome." I nodded with a grin picking up the large board and taking it inside, setting it in my room. She began flying around more, doing loops and spins around over the little arena. I smiled a little watching her have fun, I left her be and went back downstairs to prepare dinner.

"Hey Rainbow Dash, I'm gonna throw on a movie and eat dinner, wanna watch?" I asked her after I prepared my dinner.

"What's the movie?" She asked.

"It's called _The Emperor's New Groove_. One of my favorites, it's pretty funny." I told her.

"Sure, why not?" She shrugged following me downstairs. I started up the movie and sat down on the couch, digging into my pizza. The movie was just as good as I remember, Patrick Warburton's comedic timing was on point, and John Goodman and David Spade had great chemistry. From what I could tell, even Rainbow Dash kind of enjoyed it.

"That llama guy's an ass!" She remarked at one point.

"He becomes more likable later." I said. "Interestingly enough, he always kind of reminded me of your character."

"Oh really?" She asked. "How so?"

"The ego mostly." I explained. "The remarks and sarcasm throughout too."

"Alright wiseguy. I get it." She said dryly as we continued to watch the movie. When the movie was over, I put my dishes in the dishwasher and turned the video games back on.

"How about a couple more races?" I asked.

"You're on." She grinned.

* * *

 _And that brings us to the conclusion of another chapter! Hope people enjoy this story, if you do and haven't read my other stories, check out Equestria's New Comedian, a humorous and romantic story about a comedian who get's another chance in Equestria. Sources say it's a good read!_


	3. Chapter 3: What Are You Doing Here?

**Author's note:** I don't actually have a specific reason for this author's note, I'm sure nobody reads them anyway. This chapter features the first appearance of another character, Clara, and also Marie and Matt. I don't know why I shared that, but what the hey right?

* * *

Chapter Three: What Are You Doing Here?

"Have a good day sweetie!" My mom called as I went out the door to wait for the bus, it was the first day back to school after my nice long weekend. Rainbow Dash wasn't too pleased however when I told her she had to spend a majority of the day in my room so as not to let my family know she was a living thing, but come to think of it, when I got up, I couldn't find her anywhere, I felt bad, was she that upset?

"You too Ma, see you when I get home." I said closing the door behind me.

"Right arm tired after the weekend to yourself?" Bobby asked me as we stood at the end of the drive way.

"Let me answer your question with a question, shut up." I sneered.

"I'm telling mom you told me that!" He said.

"Do that and I tell her about your firework rockets." I replied.

"Jerk..." He muttered.

"Takes one to know one." I stuck my thumbs in my belt loops and rocked on my heels. Our conversation stopped as the bus arrived and we sat down in completely different areas from each other, the ride was pretty normal, I put some music on and let the time pass. As I got to school, I trudged inside and sat down at a bench outside the cafeteria, the regular meeting place for Matt and I before school start.

"Hey Johnny." He said as I sat down.

"Hey Matt, how's it going?" He asked.

"It's Monday morning, how the Hell do you think?" I chuckled sipping from my travel mug.

"Good point." Matt nodded. "Catch Mick and Marty last night?"

"Season three's been good, not as good as season two though." I said.

"What about the episode where Mick turned himself into a Cucumber?"

"Overrated." I said. "So guess what."

"What?" He asked.

"Marie wants to actually hang out with me, tomorrow at lunch!" I said.

"Thought you said you didn't care." He replied.

"I... I don't." I shook my head.

"Yeah whatever." He snickered.

"I don't!" I said. Before he could come up with anything smart the bell rang and everyone in the cafeteria area fled like lab rats to their various cages that are the classrooms. Of course what I meant was we embarked on our exciting journey to knowledge, stay in school kids. My first class was a pretty simple one, Nutrition. One of those easy A classes you take to boost your average a little. I yawned once more and I sat down in my seat, next to my other friend Clara, already part way through a drawing.

"And what is that suffering abomination?" I asked, looking at it.

"Oh, hey Freakazoid, you like it? I call it "Sexy Venus Fly-Trap", I'd say it's one of my best pieces." She showed me, the drawing was a very thin and muscular humanoid body wearing tight boxers with a very large crotch bulge, complete with long vine like limbs with leaf hands and feet, to boot of course the head was a Venus fly trap.

"That seems oddly aimed at girls more... how shall I say this, more heterosexual than you... or guys that are more homosexual than I am." I arched my eyebrow.

"If I ever want to be an artist, I have to learn how to appeal to all bases." She explained.

"Yes, because so many bases _really_ want male stripper plants." I chuckled.

"Hey, furries became a thing, who knows? maybe the next things will be planties, or leafies?" She suggested.

"Leafies?" I snickered. "Oh please."

"Besides, I've got way more lesbian aimed stuff here." She leafed through her sketch book.

"Please don't tell me their plant based." I said.

"Nope, what do you like? I've got stuff for every kink or sexuality here. Any fictional characters you like? A fictional character doesn't exist that I haven't drawn some real steamy stuff of." She smirked. "Like this one?" She flashed me a picture that almost made me vomit.

"Is that...?" I began to ask.

"Octoward Tentecleaves from SpongeRob? Sure is." She chuckled.

"You are going to Hell." I shook my head and sighed.

"Well there's no need to be rude just because you don't like it." She pouted. "I'll have you know the scan of this was extremely popular online."

"I'm sure of it, all the internet is going to Hell too, from the smut artists to the fan fiction writers." I scoffed.

"So then you'll be going to Hell too? Because I found your fan fiction." She smirked.

"You what?" I blushed a little.

"Well, your username _JohnnyReedDaBrony_ did give it away, but I gotta say, 'Chronicles of Equestria' was a good read, when are you updating that?" She snickered.

"When I move it to a different site." I replied.

"I mean, it was no 'Equestria's New Comedian', but it was alright." She said.

"Are you kidding? That story is _terrible_." I replied. "And how many My Little Pony fan fictions have you read?"

"I just skimmed through the first page of results once for fun." She explained.

"Mhm." I nodded.

"Ooh! That girl you like, Marie texted me looking for you this weekend, what's that about huh?" She asked.

"None of your business." I replied.

"Actually, it is, see, she texted me, this bringing me into this." She explained.

"I see your point, she needs me to help her study for the test this week." I said.

"Oh, had I known it was something that boring I wouldn't have asked." She fake snored to go with that. "Let me know when she's carrying your bastard child or something."

"Will you stop?" I asked.

"I'm kidding! She'd never agree to even do that with you let alone carry the kid." She snickered putting her earbuds back in.

"I need new friends." I muttered to myself.

"You sure do." A small voice said from my book bag, I looked down to see Rainbow Dash peeking her head out of the small side pocket on my book bag.

"What are you doing here!?" I growled down at her.

"I didn't feel like bein' locked in a room all morning, so I decided to tag along." She explain.

"You decided to tag along?" I asked. "There could not have been a more terrible idea that that, you have to keep quiet. All day." I growled.

"Oh come on." She whined. "What's gotten into you?"

"What's gotten into me is that this isn't a safe place for you!" I growled. "You have to remain quiet and hidden."

"Why?" She asked.

"There are hundreds of people here! That's why!" I growled. "That's it." I said before sipping up the packet she was in.

"Oh uncool." She muttered inside the pocket. The rest of the class went pretty well, she was pretty much quiet until about five minutes until the end of class when I felt something poking my shoe, I looked down to see she had found a relatively sharp pencil and had managed to puncture a hole in the pocket, she was now either attacking me on purpose or poking blindly. I bent down and took the pencil away from her.

"Do you mind!?" I growled. Before she replied my teacher gave me a look.

"Mr. Reed, is there a problem?" He asked, remarking me talking to my book bag.

"Nope! No problem!" I grinned before giving my book bag a swift kick.

"Ow!" I could hear Rainbow Dash growl.

"Shut _up._ " I murmured to her. Before long the bell rang and I made a beeline for my locker. I quickly put in my combination and stuffed my book bag in, grabbing all that I needed for my classes before lunch.

"What are you doing?" She asked, peeking through the little hole she had punctured in the pocket.

"I'm leaving it here. I'll be back for you at the end of the day." I said sternly shutting the door.

"This _bites_." She sighed. "Ugh, I may have messed up here. Uhhh ratatata... skrratatatatata... skip-bob-padoodly-doowopbadoo..." She muttered random noises to herself laying in the top shelf of the locker. She flew up and looked through the small vent at the top of the locker. "Not a person around! You don't know what you're talking about Johnny." She chuckled. "How do I get outta here?" She asked herself, looking around. "What's this thing?" She asked herself picking up a ruler. "This might do the trick." She grinned. Holding the heavy ruler she began to saw away at the tab holding my lock on. After about twenty straight minutes of sawing away she heard a loud clang on the floor and the door creaked open. "Rainbow Dash one, locker zero." She snickered opening the door. "Now where's Johnny?" She grinned as she began to flap through the large hallway.

Not too long after when I was in the middle of Modern History class passing around notes to Matt, mostly talking about how tired we were of hearing about the "Schlieffen plan", I saw something small and blue fly by the door window of the classroom.

"You've got to be kidding." I moaned. "Um, Mrs. Mullenger? May I please be excused... to the bathroom?" I asked.

"Very well Johnathan." She nodded, with that I frantically got up and left the classroom.

"C'mon, where are you?" I could hear her mutter in the hall, I turned and cleared my throat, getting her attention.

"What are you doing here!?" I asked. "How did you get out of the locker?"

"Let's just say you need a new ruler." She explained.

"Ughhh." I moaned. "This is ludicrous."

"You tossed me in a locker! I don't like captivity!" She whined.

"This place isn't safe for you!" I said.

"What's the big deal?" She asked.

"Because those hundreds of people can't know you're here or know you're alive! Both are recipes for disaster!" I said frantically.

"Aww, you care." She laughed.

"You're making light of this and it's not funny." I said dryly. "Come on." I grabbed her.

"Hey! A little warning next time!" She said as I stuffed her into the pocket of my hoodie.

"You're going to stay quiet for the rest of the day, capisce?" I asked.

"Yeah yeah." She muttered as I made my way back to class and nonchalantly sat down.

"You alright?" Matt chuckled at the way I was suddenly acting.

"Yeah, yeah fine." I nodded.

"Somethings got him shook up." Clara nodded. "He was being weird this morning too."

"Go back to your smut art." I retorted.

"I'd be offended, but that's what I'm doing." She nodded. "See?" She showed Matt a picture, who gagged.

"I'm never going to see Ernie and Bert the same way again." He shuddered.

"I wanna see!" A little voice said in my pocket, prompting me to flick her a little. "Hey!" She groaned.

"What do you have in there? A hamster?" Matt asked.

"It's nothing." I dismissed him.

"He's losing it..." Clara hummed.

"I am not!" I replied hastily. At lunch I decided to spend lunch alone, something I normally did, Matt hung out with his basketball friends most of the time at lunch and Clara hung out with her frighteningly eccentric ultra left-wing friends in the art room drawing or doing only God knows what. So anyway, this was me, alone, normally I'd just make rounds through the hallway and listen to music. And I was doing the same thing this time, except at the same time I was keeping hold on a squirmy little action figure. Aside from that though it was just like a normal day, me, alone with my thoughts. Except today it was a bit different, even looking past the Rainbow Dash thing. As I walked down the hall someone tapped me on the shoulder. I jumped up and turned around, almost having a heart attack when I saw who it was.

"Marie! Hi! Uh... um... what... what, what's up?" I asked feeling rather awkward.

"Hi Johnathan, I just wanted to make sure you remembered that we're meeting up tomorrow." She said sweetly.

"Yeah! Yeah of course." I nodded, feeling sweat already starting to come off my forehead.

"Great! I guess I'll see you tomorrow." She nodded.

"Yep! Well, I mean you'll see me next class..." I rubbed my arm awkwardly.

"I guess I will." She giggled a bit, she had such a cute laugh. "See you then!" She said as she walked away.

"Yeah..." I nodded quietly, even though at this point she was long gone.

"Wow, you are a lost cause when it comes to this sort of stuff." Rainbow Dash laughed from inside my pocket.

"When we get back home I am locking you in my sock drawer." I threatened.

"You wouldn't." She growled.

"I had a G.I Joe in there for seven years." I said. "Mostly because he got lodged in the back and I forgot about him."

"You're a terrible person." She replied.

"I didn't know he was alive!" I defended myself. The rest of the day went pretty smoothly, I awkwardly glanced at Marie all throughout class, causing Clara to snicker and sketch up a... rather inappropriate drawing of Marie and I. As for a ride home I had the pleasure of Matt driving me home over the loud, body odor filled big yellow sardine can that is the school bus. "Thanks for taking me home." I said to Matt as he pulled up in my driveway.

"Yeah no problem, that'll be ten bucks for gas next time you see me." He chuckled as he drove off.

"We'll see about that." I said as I trudged up my driveway and inside. "Honey, I'm home!" I called out jokingly.

"Oh God, it's Johnathan." My little bother whined.

"Love you too." I said making my way up the stairs and into my room, tossing my backpack onto my bed and sitting down at my desk chair to start up on some homework, Tank propelled his way over to me to see what I was doing and Rainbow Dash, knowing the coast was finally clear flew out of my pocket.

"You were kidding about sticking me in the sock drawer, right?" She asked.

"Obviously." I nodded.

"Phew." She sighed with relief. "I thought you were serious for a second, whatever happened to that G.I Joe anyway?" She asked.

"I think Bobby took him, but I'm pretty sure he sent him in a box to Value Village, a second hand store." I explained. I could hear a very audible gag from Rainbow Dash. "What?"

"Please tell me you're not going to do the same to me." She said.

"I don't think Bobby will ever take an interest in you, but no, I won't send you off to a thrift store." I said.

"Or a yard sale?" She asked.

"I don't plan on it." I shook my head.

"Or a daycare center?" She asked again.

"You know, for someone who just the other day hated the fact they ended up with me you seem pretty attached to staying with me." I arched my eyebrow.

"Well... I mean, you aren't that bad, actually you're pretty nice." She said without making eye contact with me. "That and daycare's are gross."

"Amen to that one sister." I nodded. Worst summer job of my life was at a daycare center, it was like watching thirty balls of hyperactive mucus. We both sat there silently for a moment before she spoke up again.

"Listen... Uh... I'm sorry I stowed away today." She said awkwardly.

"Hm?" I asked, feeling a little surprised at the apology.

"Yeah, I could tell that you were worried about me since it wasn't safe and all... I shouldn't have stowed away." She explained.

"You're right. You shouldn't have." I shook my head. "But, I understand not wanting to be locked up all day... I forgive you, I'm just glad you're okay." I said.

"Thanks." She said looking down, poor girl, she must feel like she'd be lonely just on her own here, I mean, she'd have Tank, but it's not the same as a friend to talk with. That's when I had an idea. That night, before I went to bed I went online to Amazon and looked around.

"This ought to be perfect." Luckily they had a deal going, two for the price of one, I decided not to tell her and let it be a surprise for when they show up. I had a feeling she'd be real excited about this. I guess in a way, things were looking up for both of us! She had some friends on the way, and I was going to spend tomorrow's lunch with the lady of my dreams. Tomorrow was looking bright for me indeed.

* * *

 _Which brings us to the end of yet another chapter, sorry for the wait, and for the smaller length than before. Hope you enjoyed it! Who're the new friends gonna be? Guess you'll have to keep reading to find out!_


	4. Chapter 4: Studies and Buddies

**Author's note:** Oh boy, another chapter coming at you. What's gonna happen this time? I'm thinking Johnathan becomes a robot, Rainbow Dash gets a cell phone, and Clara gets a bear or something.

* * *

Chapter 4: Johnny Studies and Rainbow Gets Buddies

"Now remember, just try and keep quiet, I left my laptop open with the movie file open if you want to watch something, but make sure it plays through the headphones." I told Rainbow Dash as I grabbed my backpack and got ready to head out.

"I will." She nodded.

"Alright, see you around four." I said as I closed the door.

"Have fun on your lunch date!" She called patronizingly.

"Oh shut up." I muttered. The morning at school went as usual, I chatted with Matt about any new movie trailer news that had dropped recently, I tolerated Clara's smut art and snarky comments. Then came lunch time. As soon as the bell rang I went directly to Ms. Cooper's room and sat down.

"Oh, hello Johnathan, what are you doing here?" She asked. "I taught you last semester."

"I know." I said. "I'm here to help Marie do a little studying, I hope that's okay."

"Oh that's perfectly fine!" She nodded. "Don't mind me at all." She said as she went back to what she was working on, moments later Marie walked in the room with her books and sat down at the desk next to the one at which I was sitting.

"Hi Johnathan! Once again, so glad you agreed to this, I really need this test!" She smiled.

"What? You kidding? Of course!" I nodded a bit nervously. "So... so what do you need help with?"

"Well just a couple of things for the math test, that's all." She said. "I'm pretty confident, but I really need a good grade on this test for when I send my transcript." She concluded. As she opened her books, a couple of scrap sheets of paper fell out onto the floor, she quickly picked them up.

"What are those?" I asked.

"It's for a report, remember Chuck Murphy?" She asked.

"Wasn't he that comedian who was an alumni of here? I remember reading something in the news about him last year, didn't he kill himself?" I asked.

"Everyone thinks it." She said. "But I don't, they never found the body right? Not a single trace! I think he up and left the country, I think _he_ killed someone else." She said.

"Really?" I asked.

"Well, I do think he's alive, I don't think he really killed anyone." She said as she put the notes away. "I hope he's alive anyway, my dad used to sneak me in to the bars he'd play at to watch his shows, he was _so_ funny."

"He was, and I should know, I was his audience before he hit the big time, well, as big a time he ever hit." A voice said across the room, there stood a teacher who was broad in build but thin, with dark auburn curly hair and three day stubble, this was the theater teacher Mr. Murphy, apparently a relative of Chuck.

"You knew him?" Marie asked him.

"Knew him? He was his cousin." Ms. Cooper spoke up. "What can I do for you Sterling?" She asked.

"I just wanted to make sure I could put you down for the band in the pit for the musical." He said.

"I'll be there, what's the show this year?" She asked.

"Avenue Q, we have to do the stupid watered down school appropriate version though." He replied, as they talked Marie and I got back on track.

"So maybe just fill me in on some of the quadratics related stuff and I should be good." She said.

"Yeah! Yeah sure." I replied a little nervously. So, here I was, sitting next to the girl of my dreams, not only was she pretty, smart, but I just realized she had another amazing quality about her, she was a disappearance case geek! There was about ten people in the whole school who knew the name Chuck Murphy, and only three who cared, and she was one of them! I had a tendency to obsess over things nobody else really cared about, but to see that she did to? Wow. Lunch seemed to fly by as we studied and talked, I was in heaven. When the bell rang she got up and gathered her books.

"Thanks again Johnathan!" She said as she got up. "I actually had a pretty good time."

"Glad to know I make a painfully boring subject just a bit more bearable." I replied as I stood up.

"Well, to be honest you deserve some credit, it's a terribly boring subject and not many can make it fun." She said.

"Well thank you." I said. "I had a good time with you too."

"Naturally." She smirked a little as she left, I sighed a little as I packed up my books to head to my class. Ms. Cooper chuckled a little at me as I left.

"What was that?" She laughed.

"What was what?" I asked.

"That! "Glad to know I make a painfully boring subject a bit more bearable!" That is where you _should_ have said "Hey, I have a little bit of extra Christmas money from my grandma from Arkansas and want to know if you want to get lunch with me sometime!" You dolt!" She laughed. "But of course as a teacher that's technically none of my business."

"You don't have to point out that I'm pathetic, I already know." I replied as I left the classroom. The rest of the day went as per the usual up until the end of the day when I was walking down the hallway to the exit, I passed the doors to the school's auditorium and saw Marie looking at a piece of paper before writing down on it. I looked at it quizzically from a distance before walking up to it, after she left of course, it was an audition sign up sheet and she had signed up! Huh, those musical theater kids seemed to all be close, maybe this could be a chance to get close to Marie, I had a bit of experience in theater, none recent. Mostly just playing bit characters in those dreadful elementary school plays that often taught a lesson about recycling or dental health. I still remember my stunning performance as "plaque" in " _The Inconvenient Tooth_ ", without giving it a second thought I signed up for auditions. Maybe I should have thought that one through, we'll have to see. When I got home I saw that Rainbow Dash had been more than happy to entertain herself with my laptop.

"Your mother's dead!" She laughed as I walked in the door. I Looked at her with a shocked expression half expecting to see my mother lying dead on the floor. When I saw no such sight I arched my eyebrow and looked at her.

"What!?" I asked.

"That's what the funny little guy on this show said!" She pointed to the screen. I looked to see her watching " _It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia_ ", this was a quote from Danny Devito's character Frank Reynolds had said.

"A little more context would have been nice." I said as I sat down on the bed next to her. "What episode are you on?" I asked.

"The one where the blonde girl has a heart attack." She replied.

"Ooh! This one starts a little slow it gets pretty funny." I said as I watched with her.

"Shh! No spoilers huh?" She asked.

"Alright alright." I said as I shut up and let her watch. As time passed I got some homework done listening to the background sounds of the comedic yet incredibly politically incorrect show, I did break the silence once more to tell Rainbow Dash about my day. "I had that lunch with Marie today." I said.

"Judging by what I heard of your conversation the other day I'm sure it was _so_ riveting." She remarked.

"Ha ha." I said flatly. "Actually it was quite nice, we talked, turns out she's looking into this comedian who disappeared even though everyone's pretty sure it was a suicide."

"Wow, that is interesting." She said sarcastically.

"She also signed up for the musical." I said.

"Wow!" She said flatly, not even listening.

"I did too." I said.

"Oh really?" She still wasn't listening when suddenly it registered. "What?"

"I signed up for the musical." I repeated.

"Can you even... _sing_?" She asked.

"Sure I can!" I replied.

"And you aren't just doing this so you can satisfy your disgusting human pheromones?" She asked.

"Oh I'm sure that it's just why I did." I said.

"You are an idiot." She said bluntly.

"That I won't deny." I admitted. Days went by as normal, I'd go to school, have revelations that I need new friends, accept that I could set myself on fire and Marie wouldn't notice me, and then come home and watch TV with Rainbow Dash, I was even able to get her into The Office, which was surprising, because while seasons two through nine are great, season one is an absolute chore to get through. Soon the weekend came, and Saturday morning as I got the mail, in our mail slot in the communal mailbox was a key for the package container! My order must have arrived.

"Alright Johnny, time for Talking Toy Ponies 2: Electric Boogaloo." I chuckled to myself as I unlocked the parcel storage and took mine out. When I got home I Sharpied "Hey Dashie, open us!" on the package and set the box in my room and went downstairs to play video games for a bit. Moments later I heard an excited squeal from upstairs and figured that was her. I paused my game and made my way upstairs. I could hear from the hallway a squeaky little voice talking a mile a minute.

"Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! I have a feeling we're gonna be the best of friends! It's so great to meet you even though I kind of already know you because we're just toys based off of characters but still I'm sure you're just as awesome as _the_ Rainbow Dash!" The voice said excitedly, I decided to make myself known to them and open the door, as expected when I did, the two newcomers dropped lifelessly to the floor, these were Pinkie Pie and Applejack, figures from the same line as Rainbow Dash. Upon noticing that Rainbow Dash still stood with life Applejack shot a look at her and said frantically between closed teeth.

"Are you some Chinese knockoff? That there's a human!" She growled. "Get down!" Rainbow Dash just looked at the two and chuckled.

"Guys, this is Johnathan, he's my friend." She said.

"Friend?" Applejack asked standing up. "Toys are never _friends_ with their humans!"

"I dunno Applejack!" The other, Pinkie Pie said as she bounced up and down happily on my shoe. "He seems friendly! And besides, there's always a first time for everything, he treats Dashie okay! I'm sure he's a fine friend!" She said. "Hi Mister Johnathan! I'm Pinkie Pie! Thanks for buying me!"

"I can assure you I'm a friend." I chuckled as I sat down on my bed and lifted up the tiny pink pony toy. "Please, don't consider it buying, consider it more adopting or even befriending!" I said. "I don't see you as property, I see you as a friend." I said to all of them.

"Even so," Applejack said. "Rainbow Dash, how did he even find out about the whole coming to life thing?" She asked.

"It's a long story." Rainbow Dash said. "But it does involve a rocket."

"Oh no." Applejack remarked, at the same time Pinkie "Oohed" in excitement. Rainbow Dash began to tell the story of when she first arrived, her failed attempts at escaping, my severe interrogation method, the awkward/emotional conversation that ensued after, and eventually forming a bond. As she finished her story, Applejack looked up at me.

"Well, I must admit that took my by surprised, I had just figured that I had been meant for some kid." Applejack remarked.

"I think it's better this way!" Pinkie said. "We get to jump, run, move around, and talk whenever we want, and as far as we know this guy has grown out of the icky sticky finger phase that kids go through!"

"Yes, I did exit that phase a long time ago." I nodded. "I just want you all to be happy here, I'm pretty reasonable too, have a request? I can normally fill it. I even have a big yard that you can roam around in, with my supervision of course taking things like lawnmowers and birds of prey into account." I explained.

"See?" Pinkie said. "This will be fun!" Applejack nodded slightly.

"Well, I s'pose this is better than being played with once then forgotten under a bed or something." She said. "Alright Johnathan, friends?" She extended her tiny orange plastic hoof.

"Friends." I nodded as I shook it gently. "Just a couple of things, you can't be too loud, don't leave this room unless I give the okay," I then looked directly at Rainbow Dash as I said the last rule. "No stowing away in my back pack." I finished. "Otherwise, mi casa su casa."

"Thanks Mister Johnny!" Pinkie giggled as she hopped off the bed to be with Rainbow and Applejack. "So, what's there to do for fun?" She asked Rainbow Dash.

"Watching TV, we can go outside sometimes, video games, something I like to do is make cat noises when nobody is around to drive the dog downstairs crazy." Rainbow Dash explained.

"I've also got cards, board games, and I think I have an Etch a Sketch somewhere." I added.

"Cards huh?" Applejack asked. "You know poker?" She asked.

"Do I know poker?" I scoffed. "You're looking at the 8th grade class of 2014 poker champion." I remarked as I got the deck out. "You two in?" I asked the others.

"I'm down." Rainbow Dash nodded.

"I'll watch, but if you start playing Go Fish you know where to find me!" Pinkie said. I shuffled the deck and dealt in Applejack and Rainbow Dash and we began to play, turns out I'm not as good as I remember, we played fifteen games and I won four of them. Ouch. Applejack laughed at my bad luck.

"You were saying, Mister Champ?" She chuckled as she laid down a straight flush, winning the game.

"It's a stupid game anyway." I muttered as I tossed the cards down. It was that point I was called down for dinner, I got up and went for the door. "Keep playing if you like, winner gets full domain over what gets watched on my laptop tonight." I chuckled as I shut the door behind me. That night I found out that Pinkie Pie had a fondness for " _Adventure Time_ " which didn't surprise me as much as the fact that not only did she join in, but also won.

As the days went by Rainbow Dash stopped looking so down whenever I'd leave, I guess I made the right moving getting some friends for her, I think what's best about it is that they seem to like me too. And if nothing else I had planned worked out, at least I'd have them. Was it a little weird sudenly being friends with action figures? A little, yeah. But in a way it was cool, especially to have some company when I had the house to myself. Speaking of plans, apperantly those auditions I signed up for were coming up the next Monday, was I starting to question if they were a good idea? Yes. Yes I was.


	5. Chapter 5: Pinkie and the Dog

**Author's note:** so I kind of had an epiphany, the past couple chapters kind of strayed from what the story is really about. Marie, Matt, and Clara are being put to the side and we'll be focusing more on Johnathan and the ponies. A big thank you to zackstone13 who inspired this chapter.

* * *

Chapter 5: Pinkie and the Dog

So, I'm a moron, turns out the musical sign up sheet were for people interested in going _next_ year. Which means I can't, but, I feel a bit better knowing that Marie can't either, so we're both the moron here. Good going Matt, log the girl you like as a moron.

"Don't go too nuts while I'm gone." I said as I grabbed my backpack and closed the door. "Applejack's in charge." I added before leaving.

"What!?" Rainbow asked the group as she hung from the pull cord of my bedroom light like a bat. "Why her?"

"Because he knows that I am the most responsible out of the three of us." Applejack said simply hopping to the floor from the nightstand she was standing on.

"But I mean, who's the most _fun_ out of the three of us?" Pinkie asked as she added another pair of socks to her sock fort she was building. "Me!" She concluded.

"Fun doesn't keep everything in order, and are you using _clean_ socks?" Applejack asked.

"I think so!" Pinkie said before she took a whiff of the inside the fort. "Okay... maybe except for one.." She wheezed as she bunched the dirty sock up. "Dodge the sock!" She cheered as she lobbed the sock at Rainbow Dash, who was caught off guard and was hit by the sock, sending her falling down, luckily Pinkie's sock fort broke her fall.

"Awww! Now I have to start all over!" Pinkie whined.

"And these antics are why Johnathan left me in charge, and not you two." Applejack said seriously. "Now put the dirty sock in the hamper, find it's match too." She ordered.

"Who made you boss?" Rainbow Dash asked. "Oh... wait." She then remembered I literally had just made her boss a minute ago.

"Exactly." Applejack nodded as she began to throw the clean pairs of socks into my sock drawer. "Now, who wants to organize a TV schedule to make sure everyone gets to watch what they want?" She asked.

"How about whoever gets to the laptop first gets domain?" Rainbow Dash suggested.

"Now you know that would be Pinkie Pie. And do you really want to watch _Spongebob Squarepants_ all day?" Applejack asked.

"There's no need for you to be such a Squidward about it!" Pinkie giggled.

"I see your point." Rainbow Dash nodded. "Yeah. Let's make that schedule."

"I thought you'd see things my way." Applejack said smugly. "Now, we all get one hour each to watch what we want. I can imagine we can do other things that sit around and watch TV."

"Like what? Count the boards on the floor?' Rainbow Dash said sarcastically.

"Forty seven!" Pinkie said. "I already did."

"That makes for _nothing_ else to do!" Rainbow whined. "Unless..." She then looked at the door. Pinkie grinned widely at her idea as Applejack shook her head.

"No way." She said. "Johnathan said that we-" Rainbow Dash cut her off.

"Who's been around here longer? Me or you?" Rainbow Dash asked. "If I think we'll be fine, we'll be fine." She said as she flew up to the doorknob.

"Don't you dare." Applejack said sternly. Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and twisted the knob.

"Oops, I dared." She chuckled as the door opened. Pinkie bounced excitedly out the door as Rainbow Dash flew after her. Applejack ran after Pinkie, yelling for her to come back.

"Now you come back here this instant Pinkie Pie, you too Rainbow Dash!" She ordered.

"Nah." Rainbow Dash shook her head, just then, the door creaked shut and the latch clicked, but there was another click too, the click of my lock. Applejack's eyes widened nervously.

"Rainbow Dash, twist the doorknob." She said slowly.

"What?" She asked.

"Just. Twist. The. Knob." She said slowly and monotonously. "You don't have to go back in the room, just turn it."

"Okay..." Rainbow Dash said slowly as she tried to twist the knob. "Oh no." She remarked when it wouldn't budge.

"Way to go." Applejack rolled her eyes. "Now we're locked out of the room, the one place we're supposed to be."

"Yay! More house to explore!" Pinkie remarked excitedly. "Race you to the living room!" She said, hopping down the stairs.

"Pinkie Pie!" Applejack hollered before looking to Rainbow Dash with an impatient look on her face. "Thanks. Thanks a lot for this."

"Don't be such a crab-apple." Rainbow Dash chuckled. "Let's go find her."

"Then we go straight back to the room." Applejack said as they made their way down the stairs.

"No, then I show you guys what great fun video games are." Rainbow said. "It's Thursday, Johnny will be the first one home anyway."

"You'd better be right." Applejack sighed.

"I'm always right." Rainbow Dash replied.

"Somehow I doubt that." Applejack replied before tripping and falling, luckily it was the last step and the hardwood floor broke her fall. "Ow..." She groaned.

"Last step's a doozy, huh?" Rainbow Dash snickered.

"Shut up." Applejack said, putting her small plastic hat back on. "She couldn't have gotten far."

"Hey guys! You won't believe what I just found!" Pinkie called for them. They exchanged looks and ran towards the sound of her voice, she was in the back porch room of the house... which is where the dog was in his kennel. Now, I had warned Rainbow Dash not to mess with the dog, I had given no such warning to Pinkie Pie, out of negligence obviously. She had found the dog and in typical Pinkie fashion was annoying the large creature, oblivious to any possible danger.

"Hi!" She said to the large dog. "Aren't you a cute little guy! Well, more like a cute _big_ guy! What breed are you? A doberman? A mastiff? I have no clue what dog breeds look like!" She giggled, pressing her face right up to the cage. My dog started to growl, and if my little brothers old GI Joes were any indication, if he got loose around Pinkie and the others it would not be good.

"Pinkie, you've gotta back away now." Rainbow Dash warned.

"Why not? He's cute! And he seems friendly!" Pinkie giggled.

"Pinkie, you'd think a great white shark seems friendly." Applejack said flatly.

"That one shark was!" Pinkie said. "He even said so! 'Fish are friends, not food!' Remember?"

"That wasn't a real shark." Applejack shook her head. "Just stay away from the dog!"

"Relax! He's in the cage, I'm out here, what could happen?" Pinkie asked as she foolishly began climbing the metal bars of the kennel. She giggled as the dog continued growling, eventually having enough and batting at her with his paw. He hit her, making her lose her grip and she fell, as she fell she clung onto something, something that made a click sound when she clutched it, the latch of the kennel...

"Remember that word Johnathan said when he stubbed his toe?" Applejack asked.

"Yeah?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"I think right now would also be an appropriate time to use it..." Applejack said slowly as the kennel door creaked open. Pinkie lept from the latch and joined the others. The dog stood up on his legs and glared at the three toy ponies, growling menacingly.

"Anypony else think running is a good idea right about now?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"Yeah!" Applejack nodded as the dog made a leap for them, snatching his jaw, missing Pinkie by no more than an inch, the three screamed in terror and began to run off from the angry canine. The trio ran as fast as their little plastic legs could go, which was no match for the speed of an angry dog, but while they couldn't outrun him, they might be able to outsmart him. _Might._

"We all agree this was Pinkie Pie's fault, right?" Rainbow Dash asked, the three finding solitude in one of the few places the dog couldn't get them. Under the living room couch.

"Actually, this was your fault." Applejack said. "Had you not opened the door, we would still be in the room!"

"Maybe if _you_ weren't on such a kick to make the day boring she wouldn't have opened the door!" Pinkie said to Applejack.

"Why are you defending me?" Rainbow Dash asked Pinkie. "I think it's your fault."

"You do?" Pinkie asked. "I wasn't listening."

"Everypony quiet!" Applejack hollered. "We need to think of a way to get out of here and back to the room."

"With that evil dog roaming around?" Rainbow Dash asked. "Fat chance."

"Do you think Johnathan will still like us after we have chew marks all over us?" Pinkie asked worriedly.

"We're not going to have to worry about that if we can think of a plan." Applejack said.

"We could fight it?" Pinkie suggested.

"With what?" Rainbow Dash asked, looking around. "All that's under here is a glove, a couple of thumbtacks, some twine, and a screwdriver!"

"What type of screwdriver?" Applejack asked.

"Why does that matter?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"I dunno, you could probably get the dog's eye out good with it." Applejack shrugged, the morbidness of her suggestion made Pinkie gasp in awe.

"You wouldn't _really_ do that, would you?" Pinkie asked.

"Well... no." Applejack shook her head.

"Guys, the dog's getting a little closer, so pull it together!" Rainbow Dash whispered, "I think he's onto us."

"No kidding." Applejack remarked.

"You know, there's always the option of waiting under here until Johnathan comes home..." Pinkie suggested.

"No way! I ain't letting him think that I let this happen." Applejack shook her head.

"I think he's gonna notice anyways that something went south," Rainbow Dash muttered. Just then, the dog's nose dropped dangerously close to the edge of the couch's underside, as if it was a kind of radar searching for them... which was probably exactly what it was supposed to be doing.

"Great, this is just great." Applejack muttered, inches away from the dog's snout.

"Wait! I've got an idea!" Pinkie exclaimed, running to a bundle of twine towards the back of the couch.

"What is it?" Rainbow Dash asked, "I'm all up for just about any plan you could pull out at this point!"

"Remember that movie Johnny showed us once?" Pinkie asked, tying one end of the long string of twine to Rainbow Dash's hoof. "I think it was Umpire Fights Back or something?" She asked, eluding to the movie _Empire Strikes Back_.

"Empire Strikes Back," Rainbow Dash corrected, "And I think she's on to something!" She looked to the dog and grinned. "It could work!"

"We need to get him to reach in with his paw first to get the twine on." Applejack said.

"Leave that to me!" Pinkie said before briefly popping her head out from under the couch. "Hey puppy! C'mere boy! C'mere!" She exclaimed, getting his attention. The dog jammed his paw under the couch to grab at her but she dodged the swing, quickly tying the twine around the dog's paw. "Now!" She said to Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow Dash quickly flew out with her end of the twine and started flying around the dogs legs, with the intention of tangling up its legs. Apparently, the dog wasn't smart enough to realize the trick in time and soon its mobility was greatly hindered as it desperately snapped at the flying toy with every pass.

"It's working!" Rainbow Dash shouted, barely dodging the jaws of her target.

"C'mon Rainbow Dash!" Applejack cheered. "You rustle that varmint!"

"Once you've went around enough tie the knot!" Pinkie hollered.

Rainbow Dash made one final pass and managed to tie the knot just as the dog knocked her flight off enough to cause a crash landing. But the deed had been done and the dog soon fell to the floor helplessly, unable to stand or move his legs.

"Worth it!" Rainbow Dash called from her crashed position on the floor.

"Not so tough now huh?" Applejack smirked, getting right in the dog's face, who then snapped his jaw at her, causing her to jump back. "Well... maybe still a little tough."

"Can't touch this!" Pinkie laughed. "Uh oh- uh oh- uh oh- stop! Pinkie time!" She danced.

"So, now what?" Rainbow Dash asked. "I'm still all up for exploring the place, but after running into the mutt over there I wouldn't mind heading off to a safer environment."

"Or... we could go back upstairs." Applejack suggested.

"Or... nah!" Pinkie dismissed Applejack's suggestions. "I wanna play video games!"

"Make that two for video games!" Rainbow Dash cheered, "Majority wins! I love democracies!"

"Well... fine." Applejack said.

"I wanna play Mario Party!" Pinkie exclaimed.

"Nah, that game is a bit boring," Rainbow remarked. "How about Mario Kart? That game's always a good one to play!"

"I'm up for that." Applejack nodded.

"Then grab a controller and let's see if we can get that system running!" Rainbow Dash called, leading the way.

"Dibs on Toad!" Pinkie exclaimed, grabbing a controller.

"Neither of us were gonna fight you on that one." Applejack remarked, grabbing hers.

"Yeah, Toad is rather loud and obnoxious no matter what game he's in," Rainbow Dash agreed. "And he's like that in a bad way usually. I'm going with Bowser. He seems like a real beast, figuratively and literally."

"I'm going with the Koopa. Just a regular, normal, nothing crazy about him turtle." Applejack said rationally.

"Except for the fact that he's a complete coward in some Mario games," Rainbow Dash pointed out, "So, which cup do you wanna try?"

"Let's start off slow and easy." Applejack said.

"That's not what racing games are about!" Pinkie exclaimed.

"Mushroom Cup it is!" Rainbow Dash remarked. "Let's a go!"

 _Three hours later..._

"So we've played every race twice now." Applejack said.

"Balloon Battle! Balloon Battle!" Pinkie cheered. It was at that point that I got home. To see them playing video games in the living room, with my dog hogtied on the floor.

"What's going on here?" I asked.

"Uh..." Rainbow Dash looked to me and tried a smile. "Hey Johnny! Back so soon?"

"I'm back when I'd normally get back." I looked at my watch, okay, that was a lie. I left early because nothing was going on. "What are you doing out and about? Why is Otis tied down?" I asked.

"Well..." Pinkie started explaining, "After you left, we all tried to decide how to entertain ourselves, and then Dashie opened your door and we all traveled downstairs and then we found your dog and I thought, "Oh he's so cute and adorable!" And then he tried to attack me, and I ended up accidentally opening the cage and he got out and chased us around, so we decided to-"

"Pinkie!" Applejack interrupted, "Give the boy time to process what you've said so far."

"No no, I can pretty much figure out the rest." I said, kneeling down to examine the knot. "I see you were paying attention to the Star Wars marathon." I remarked.

"That was my idea!" Pinkie hummed.

"And I must admit, it was pretty awesome!" Rainbow Dash agreed, "It was worth the trouble in the end."

"Agree to disagree." Applejack mumbled.

"Well, I'm impressed." I said. "But how about instead of this..." I said, untying his legs and grabbing him by the collar, leading him to the door and attaching his leash. "I do this." I say, letting him outside. "Now, how about a fourth player?" I asked them.

Rainbow Dash grinned deviously. "Oh, it is _so_ on!"

"I could go for another round," Applejack said calmly.

"Yay!" Pinkie Pie cheered, "Prepare to get murdered!" We all looked to her with surprise. "What?" she defended, "That's what that white guy from the Annoying Orange said."

"None of you have picked Waluigi yet?" I asked. "Where have I failed you..." I sighed sarcastically.

"Pfft! Bowser's WAY cooler!" Rainbow Dash scoffed as we selected our racers.

"And yet he throws a fit like a spoiled brat whenever he loses," Applejack chuckled.

"Yes, because Koopa Troopa is _so_ cool." I taunted Applejack.

"Hey, at least he can actually pull his weight, unlike a certain character _she_ tends to pick." Applejack pointed to Pinkie Pie.

"I actually have nothing to say to defend Toad there." Pinkie admitted.

"At least you can admit to that." I chuckled.

"So... you aren't mad that I let everything get out of hand?" Applejack asked me.

"No, but I am mad you locked me out of my room." I said.

"Oops..." Rainbow Dash chuckled.

"It's fine." I said. "There's a key on a hook by the door anyway."

" _THERE'S A WHAT!?_ " They all exclaimed.

* * *

 _Boy was that an absolute bitch to write. Thank you so much to_ **The Terror of Dimensions** _who helped me write it. You made it a hell of a lot easier and less painstakingly slow. Hopefully I can get a bit better with this. Until next time!_


	6. Chapter 6: Moving In

**Author's note:** Time jump! Root-dee-doot-dee-doo! New setting, and some new friends.

* * *

Chapter 6: Moving in

Nothing helps remind you how stupid you are like investing so much thought into a girl like her going to Tipperary for university. What in the everlasting hell is there for university in Tipperary? Whatever. I still had Matt and Clara, they were going to the same college as I was, Matt and I were going to share an apartment too. Plus I still had Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Pinkie. Who cares if my high school crush was going to school in Tipperary? I certainly didn't. In fact, I think my friends cared more than I did.

"You wouldn't have wanted to be with her anyway, she was high maintenance as a friend, I can't imagine how high maintenance she would have been as a girlfriend!" Clara laughed over the phone.

"Mhm." I nodded.

"Oh come on, you can't be down about this forever, you always have internet porn." She suggested.

"Wow." I arched my brow hearing that. "Nothing fills the void more than porn." I said sarcastically. "Also, my dad is in the car with me."

"She's got a bit of a point son." My dad said. "I did it when I was your age, of course back then it was magazines."

"Oh my God. Please stop." I put my hand out in disgust. "Look Samantha, I'm fine. You can stop bringing it up."

"Alright, whatever." She replied. "Get here soon, Matt already ordered the pizza and you know he's not gonna save you a slice." She said as she hung up, I chuckled a little and turned off my phone, sliding it back into my pocket.

"Hopefully you'll meet someone nice in college or at least in the city, son." My dad said.

"Really not what I'm looking for dad." I replied.

"Suit yourself." He shrugged as he pulled over outside the apartment building. "Well, there it is." He remarked. "Your mother and I will check in soon to see how you're doing." He told me.

"Alright dad." I nodded. "Love you."

"Love you too." He nodded as I leaned across the car and gave him a hug. "Take care of the U-Move trailer when you're done moving boxes." He instructed.

"Matt already agreed to take it back with his truck." I said as I got out and unhitched it. "I'll see you tomorrow." He nodded before driving away, I turned to the U-Move and opened the door, I grabbed the first couple of boxes. One labeled _toaster,_ the other labeled _AJ, RD, PP._ Inside the second box, I could hear them converse.

"We left a three bedroom house for this?" Rainbow Dash peeked through the handle.

"Looks smaller, but it's not the house that makes a home." Applejack stated.

"We're only be living here for a couple of years." I spoke up to them. "And things are going to be different than they were at home, keep in mind."

"Matt won't be around all day, will he?" Rainbow Dash asked me.

"No, but you've got to keep yourselves quiet when he is around." I instructed. "Like now." I said as I walked inside with my boxes, immediately I was greeted by the stack of boxes in the living room... and blankets making a tent over the couch. I looked at the fort quizzically and set my boxes down. I approached the fort and lifted the blanket to see Clara and Matt, laying on their stomachs, watching Monsters Inc. on a little DVD player and eating pizza.

"I hope I'm not interrupting something." I said as I climbed inside the fort.

"C'mon in man." Matt said, grabbing me a slice of pizza as I laid down.

"Why are you watching a kid's movie?" I asked the two.

"You know the Tumblr posts, college is a time to revert back to your childish ways and long for the nostalgia of your youth, hoping to fill the void of your newfound crippling depression." Clara informed me. "Now, shut up and watch, this is a good part." She said, pointing to the screen. It was the part when Sully and Mike were arguing about whether or not the door that clearly wasn't Boo's was her door, the part that led into the whole "Put That Thing Back Where It Came From, Or So Help Me" bit.

"Well, you two enjoy acting half your age, I've got boxes to move." I said, leaving the fort and grabbing the two boxes I came in with and taking them to my room, which aside from a mattress on a bed frame was empty. I set the box with Rainbow and the others in it on the bed and opened it up, letting them free. "Keep quiet." I instructed them.

"When are we ever not quiet?" Rainbow asked.

"Lots of times." I said. "Applejack, well, you know what I'm gonna say. You're in charge." I told her.

"You can count on me." She nodded while Pinkie and Rainbow Dash complained that I always leave her in charge. I turned away and started to grab my other things from the trailer, starting to unpack things that were priority. Eventually, Clara and Matt realized it was time to stop being infantile and help out too. And soon enough, we were all packed in and enjoying dinner. Not long after, Clara got off to leave.

"Hate to eat and run, but I've got a date tonight." She said, heading for the door. "Later losers." She chuckled, closing the door behind her. Matt then turned to me and got up as well.

"Hey man, sorry to drop this on you, but my dad wanted to take me out tonight, I'll be back later." He said, grabbing his coat and hat.

"Yeah, of course." I nodded. "It's fine. I'll probably be in bed by the time you get back. Stay out of trouble, huh?" I joked with him as he left. Being all clear, I decided to head to my room and tell the girls that for now at least it was safe for them to be out and about. They seemed happy about that, Pinkie and Rainbow especially weren't a fan of being stuck in a room.

"Can we watch TV? Can we play video games? You brought the games, right?" Pinkie asked. "Ooh! Maybe we could-"

"I was thinking we'd play cards for now." I said to her, grabbing a deck and shuffling out on the coffee table in front of the couch. "Blackjack specifically."

"Ooh! That's what I was hoping!" Pinkie cheered as I gave her her cards.

"Alright Rainbow Dash, you go first." I said, she flipped her card over. It was an eight of clubs.

"Hit me." She said, I gave her another card. A five of spades. "Ugh, thirteen, give me another." I gave her one more. "What!? A ten!?" She exclaimed as she went over twenty one. Effectively losing.

"Alright Pinkie Pie. Your turn." I said, she flipped over her card, a ten of hearts.

"Yay! A ten! And in my favorite suit! Hit me!" She exclaimed. I gave her another card. Nine of clubs. "Ooh, I think I'm gonna stay, don't wanna push my luck!" She giggled.

"Alright Applejack, your turn." I said, she flipped over her card. A three of diamonds.

"Aw shucks. Off to a low start, alright, hit m-" And just as she was about to say 'hit me', a streak of red blew her right off the table, calling out a war cry. "What in the name of!?" Applejack remarked as she was tackled to the ground. She looked up and saw something. A six inch tall action figure, red, bulky, and robotic.

"Silence, alien! You are guilty until proven innocent in our courts!" The action figure growled in a thick southern twang.

"Like buck I am!" She snarled, bucking the robot toy off of her and galloping off across the floor.

"We have a runner!" The red robot remarked, suddenly, he tossed the weapon he was holding up in the air and began folding and shifting himself about, revealing a new form as an SUV. Ah, it was a Transformer. And at this point, I was assuming it was Matt's. Huh, that's funny, I thought he sold all his old toys. I watched the red van peel after Applejack and looked back at Pinkie and Rainbow Dash.

"Should we help her?" Pinkie asked.

"I think she can handle herself." Rainbow Dash answered. Just then, from the same direction the red Transformer came from, another action figure approached, this time slower moving and far more peaceful, he was blue and silver, and jet wings were visible on his back. Rainbow Dash looked at him and started to snarl.

"At ease. I come in peace." The toy answered, climbing up the coffee table to join us. "I'm sorry about my friend there, he's a special case, thinks he's the real deal. Damaged in shipping, y'know?" He explained. "Name's Thundercracker. One of Matt's last two action figures. Yeah, about fifty of us and Matt chose to keep me and that lunatic." He chuckled. "So, what are we playing?" He asked, sitting down with us. "Blackjack? Deal me in."

"The Decepticon's escaped from his cell!" We heard the other robot exclaim, charging back at us and tackling the blue one. "How many times do I have to teach you this lesson again?"

"He locks me in an upside down laundry hamper." Thundercracker explained. "He thinks it's a prison cell, but at the same time, he thinks he's a munitions expert fighting in an age old war." He explained, going through the motions of being pinned down as if it had been done millions of times.

"Sounds like a rough go." I said to him.

"One gets used to it." He sighed.

"Excuse me, red robot, hello?" I said, trying to get the crazed militia bot's attention.

"Call me Ironhide." He replied.

"Right, Ironhide. Why don't you... go and guard the base. I can take care of the prisoner for you." I suggested, hoping I could speak his language.

"Well, thank y'kindly partner." He grinned, climbing off. "You'd best watch him, he's a shifty character." He said, strolling off, presumably to guard the 'base'.

"Thank you." Thundercracker said as he climbed back to his feet.

"You're welcome, how do you stand it?" I asked.

"I hope that one day Matt will set me on the windowsill and the breeze will make me fall to my death." He replied. "Or that he'll one day drop me off at a Goodwill or Salvation Army." He said before turning to Rainbow Dash and the others, Applejack now joining us again. "So, you guys broke protocol I see."

"It's an interesting story." Rainbow Dash said. "I take it you haven't?"

"No. Somehow even numb skull over there knows not to do that." Thundercracker answered, pointing to the other robot, marching around the space of Matt's doorway, humming _I Wish I Was In Dixie Land_ as he marched. "Sometimes I feel like doing it, just to hope that he'd freak out and break me or something."

"You're not a very jovial one are you?" Applejack asked.

"What tipped you off?" Thundercracker asked rhetorically, picking up a couple cards. "Hit me." He told me. I gave him another card and his mood lightened. "Ha! Twenty-One! I win!" He exclaimed. "Whaddya say to that, ponies?"

"I say why don't you try me in a game of poker, buddy boy?" Pinkie grinned, grabbing the deck from me.

And the night went on pretty much like that, cards and conversation. Thundercracker told me some funny stories about Matt I had never known, I would have to bust one out sometime just to see what his response would be. And at the end of the night, when I decided to turn in, Thundercracker went off to where he stood in Matt's room and the ponies did that with my room, quieting down so we could all get some rest.

"Hey Johnny?" Pinkie asked me as I lied in bed, staring up at the ceiling. "Would you get rid of me if I thought I was the real Pinkie Pie?"

"I must admit, it'd be pretty exhausting, but I wouldn't, no." I replied. "Why do you ask?"

"Just wondering." She replied. "What about Rainbow Dash or Applejack?"

"Nah." I said. "Well... Rainbow Dash maybe."

"Hey!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed.

"Now, it's late and I have classes tomorrow, let's get some rest, huh?" I chuckled. "Goodnight all."

"Goodnight Johnny!" Pinkie replied.

"G'night Johnathon." Applejack yawned.

"Night John." Rainbow Dash said, resigning to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7: Lost

**Author's note:** Guess what's back-back.. back again-gain-gain... Yes we're back-back... tell a friend-friend-friend.

* * *

Chapter 7: Lost

"All I'm saying is, in a head to head contest, Applejack can out-Southern-mannerism Ironhide." Rainbow Dash said to Thundercracker one morning in the apartment, Matt and I both gone.

"No way, my guy acts like he just walked out of Texas." Thundercracker scoffed. "Especially when you take his whacked processor into account."

"Zing!" Rainbow Dash snorted a laugh. "However, it's not fair your guy has an advantage, thinking he really is his character."

"Wanna talk unfair? I've had to live with him for almost ten years!" Thundercracker replied.

"Sounds rough." Rainbow remarked. "I've only had to deal with my crew for a little less than half a year."

"You'll probably learn to hate them." Thundercracker replied grimly. "So you can actually fly huh? Lucky."

"Why can't you?" Rainbow asked. "You've got the wings."

"Yeah, but I turn into a jet, no fuel attached, all I can do is roll on the ground." He replied.

"That sounds pretty terrible." Rainbow Dash noted.

"It is. Along with a lot of my life." He replied.

"Aw quit yer whining." Applejack remarked from up above on the windowsill. "All yer friends are prob'ly bein' groped by some little jelly covered varmint. Consider yerself lucky." She concluded.

"Thank you for painting such a grim picture of my lifelong friends." Thundercracker remarked. "Also, we live in a city on a coastline and it's overcast. The winds are strong today, standing by an open window is a bad idea when you're less than a pound."

"Gee, thanks Mr. Roboto. Listen, I think I know when I'm in over my he-" Just then, a strong gust of wind blew and Applejack went right out the window.

"Applejack!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed, flying up to the window while Pinkie quickly did the same, only exerting more effort due to having to climb. Lucky for Applejack, she did not fall onto the hard pavement, instead, her fall was broke by a garbage bag, and about six other garbage bags in an open dumpster under the window.

"Well ain't that just a pretty picture?" Applejack grumbled to herself, brushing garbage off of herself and climbing out of the dumpster. "Now, how in Sam Hell am I gonna get back inside?" She murmured, walking out of the alley and eyeing the steps to the apartment building. Suddenly, she noticed something. A human. Looking right at her.

"Perfect..." She muttered. "Another human, as if that roommate and his loud mouthed action figure weren't bad enough." She thought before freezing up as if never alive in the first place, remembering her instructions from Johnathan.

The human figure was silent for a moment, then she heard him laugh a bit. "Oh please," he said. "There's no need for that. I've already seen you moving about for one. Plus, I've known for quite some time that toys are alive."There was no response from her. "Suit yourself then," he remarked, gently lifting her off the ground. "Guess I'll bring you inside and see if I can find your room or owner, or whatever." He walked up the steps to the apartment building and knocked on the door.

But, no answer. Both Johnathan and Matt were out at the time. "Well, shoot," the youth sighed. "Uh... I'm not sure how to make this work. Do you know the code or how to pick the lock, AJ?"

Of course, she didn't answer and a passing pedestrian gave him a weirded-out look. "You're creepy," he said and continued on by.

"Oh, you're one to talk," the youth remarked back. "You have a shrine in your room to your teacher that you bow to every day before you leave the house."

"I do not!" the passerby shouted, before adding quietly as he walked away, "Note to self: close the blinds and put up a warning sign!" The youth chuckled as he watched him leave.

"That was honestly a random guess."

"Look's like your friend's been kidnapped." Ironhide remarked, peeking over the windowsill. "Must be a Decepticon, 'course Megatron never had a soldier who looked like that."

"It's a human, idiot." Rainbow Dash sneered at the Transformer with a clear case of Buzz Lightyear syndrome.

"Hey, I heard that," the youth suddenly stated, pointing at them without looking in their direction. "But, since no one's here that will willingly help me out, guess you're stuck with me for the day AJ. Or, whenever your owner returns. Either way, let's get going."

He stood up and walked back down the steps with Applejack in his hand, then looked down the left side of the street.

"Well, I was gonna visit an old friend, but I've got plenty of time for that," he commented, then continued down the street.

"That's just fantastic." Applejack thought to herself. Back at the apartment, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie watched in horror.

"He stole her!" Pinkie exclaimed, watching him leave. "This is just like that movie! He's gonna sell her to a toy museum in Japan or something!"

"Like anyone would go to a museum with you little freaks in it." Ironhide remarked as he leaned against the wall.

"Pinkie, relax," Rainbow Dash tried to calm her down. "We just need to wait until Johnathan gets home, we saw what way he went off in, we can work from there."

* * *

"Why do I keep forgetting how to open this thi- ah!" the youth finally managed to open his seven- yes, SEVEN different locks installed to the door of the small house he called his home. It probably had only five rooms, two of which were a bedroom and bathroom respectively, but it looked relatively homey. The youth set Applejack down on a table in the living room then sat on a couch facing her. "So, how long have you been in this area?" he asked her, as if speaking to a normal person.

Applejack said nothing, she stood still in the pose she had made upon initially freezing up.

The youth sighed.

"Look, I already know about your 'freeze up' thing. Have known since an accident regarding a friend of mine," he explained. "You don't have to do it around me. Besides, there's no one else around. I won't tell."

He sounded genuine, but Applejack wasn't taking any chances any time soon.

"Maybe she's just shy, like I was," a female's voice suddenly commented, a voice that was somehow familiar to Applejack... As she wondered where she had recognized that voice before, to her disbelief another pony toy figure flew up to the youth and landed on his shoulder. It was a Ditsy Doo figure, or more popularly known as Derpy. Since even the toy figure of her had walleyes like the character she portrayed, only one eye was looking at Applejack. The youth looked to Derpy and chuckled.

"I don't blame her," he said to her. "I'd be scared to reveal it too."

"Consarnit," Applejack thought. "Is this just a NORMAL thing now?" Deciding that ultimately it was a moot point to keep the act up, she broke the act. "There." She said aloud. "Happy?" She arched her brow impatiently.

"Not entirely, but it makes things easier between us," the youth replied. "By the way, do you prefer to be called AJ, Applejack, or do you go by a name other than the character from the show?"

"Whatever y'fancy between AJ and' Applejack I guess." She replied.

"Well, pleased to meet ya AJ. They call me T," the youth replied. Derpy floated down to her and extended her hoof.

"Hi! My name's Ditsy Doo, or Derpy; whichever you prefer. But of course, you probably already knew that," she said with slight embarrassment.

"I figured as much." She nodded at Depry before looking around. "Nice lock collection." She remarked, eyeing the door.

"Eh, it's not the best thing out there, but it makes most give up on robbing me," T stated. "I have some things hidden away they'd love to get their hands on. Assuming they know where to look."

"Normally two or three do the trick." Applejack remarked. "Might wanna board the windows though if you wanna stop robbers, it'd match the look of the seven locks pretty good too."

"Yeah, but if I did that I'd look more crazy than some people think I am," he admitted. "I mean, how often do you see a guy talking to toys? Unless your owner does that?"

"He does, my friend was a little too careless when she fell into his possession, so he knew. Luckily he didn't take it as bad as I've heard happen before." She explained. "My owner's little brother's Spider Man action figure told me about something that happened to a friend of his' owner once, shipped off to a mental home at eight years old after he saw his Captain America doll walking about one day."

"Because some people just can't handle the idea unless it's on a TV screen," T chuckled, then with sympathy, "The poor child though."

"That must be terrible for him!" Derpy exclaimed.

"I bet." Applejack nodded. "So... what's your story?" She asked the Derpy figure.

"Oh. T first found me at a yard sale, or what used to be a yard sale. I was the last toy and no one had bought me yet. They even tried giving me away, but nothing worked." Derpy giggled. "And then T came by and took me over to his place. At first, I tried to keep my secret from him, but even back then he seemed to know the secret. Eventually, one too many slip ups made me give up on the act." She shuddered. "I originally stayed frozen because I was afraid of what he'd do when he knew I was alive... or when I confirmed it for him. Turns out, I was worried about nothing."

"You were given away?" Applejack asked. "You poor thing... I'm sorry."

Well, at least I didn't have something worse happen to me," Derpy replied. "One of the older toys at my previous place was given to the dog as a chew toy. Thankfully, he was a squeaky toy so it wasn't too bad a fate for him."

"Unless he was that type that can't handle such rough playtime," T stated. "In which case, RIP."

"That reminds me of something that happened at our old home." Applejack chuckled. "Pinkie Pie accidentally let the family dog loose an' he nearly made short work of us."

"Yikes! Even my dog doesn't do that," T remarked. "Sounds like Scup, or whatever his name was." Eluding to assumabley Scud from the first _Toy Story_ film.

"He was a piece of work, that's for certain." Applejack remarked.

"Well, I certainly hope you don't run into anymore dogs as crazy as that," T commented. He then gave her a curious look. "Do your friends even know your gone?"

"They're well aware." Applejack nodded. "My owner, Johnathan probably isn't, he's still got another couple hours before he gets home."

"In that case, I guess you really are stuck here for the day," T replied. "Unless you want me to leave you in a box at the front door-"

"I don't think that's a good idea," Derpy cut him off. "Remember what almost happened that one time?"

"Fair point, and well taken," T said to her.

"I s'pose I could stay here for a little while." Applejack shrugged. "It'd beat walking home only to wait in the alley for the rest of the afternoon." She admitted.

"Then make yourself comfortable," T said to her. "And feel free to explore if you're that curious. Just a fair warning though; maybe keep your distance from the dishwasher. It's been having issues."

"I once was unfortunate enough to have it explode in my face once," Derpy remarked. "Thankfully, it was just soap suds."

"I'll... keep that in mind." Applejack nodded, looking around.

"Other than that, you got it!" T exclaimed cheerfully. He then pulled out some paper. "I need to make a note for your owner. Derpy, where are the pens?"

"Oh, those weren't mini tent stakes?" she asked. T deadpanned.

"Do you do that on purpose?" he asked her as he left the room.

"Maybe..." she replied with a cheeky smile.

"You made a scaled down tent?" Applejack asked. "Clever." She remarked.

"Well, it wasn't easy. But it does give the illusion of camping out sometimes," Derpy commented. She then looked towards what Applejack could only assume was the kitchen.

"I wonder if he left a muffin out," she said to herself.

"Wait a sec, you can eat?" Applejack asked. "I know I sure as hay can't." She arched her brow ever so slightly.

"Well, not exactly. Or at least not in the sense you're probably thinking. But much like Derpy in the show, I just like to chew on one from time to time," Derpy answered.

"Okay, that should work," T was heard saying as he walked back into the room and towards the front door. In his hand was a piece of paper and some tape. Something was written on the paper.

"I'll be back in a few. You two have fun, but don't destroy the house in the process please," T told them. "I just had the plumber fix the pipes the other day, and I don't want to have to call him again. See ya soon!" He went out the door and it locked behind him... well, four of them did. The other three they could hear him locking from the outside.

"Likes to keep a relatively... quarantined state for the most part, doesn't he?" Applejack remarked.

"Well... he's not the most liked person on the block," Derpy explained. "He's made a few enemies. That, and he likes to be secluded for the most part. Something about the accident with his friend. I don't know much about it, but it seems to be a touchy subject for him."

"I see I see..." Applejack remarked, hopping down from where she stood. "So, what was life like pre-yardsale?" She asked.

"Well, my first owner used to dream of becoming a pop star..." Derpy began.

* * *

"Now which one was it again...? Ah, there it is!" T said to himself aloud as he returned to the apartment he had found Applejack outside.

"It's the Decepticon!" Ironhide called out to the others. "I'll go get my cannons."

"Shut up." Rainbow Dash scolded him. "Has he always been this way?" She asked the relatively normal personalized Decepticon toy, Thundercracker.

"Like I said, he was damaged in shipping." Thundercracker replied.

Outside, T walked over to the door, humming to himself as he taped the message to it. "This time I made sure to use the heavy duty stuff," they heard him say. "The last time I tried this without duct tape... well, I had chase it halfway across town. And with asthma, that's saying something."

"Looks like he's taping something to the door..." Thundercracker noticed.

"A ransom note!" Pinkie remarked. "Good thing I know where Johnny keeps his money." She zipped off.

"That's just what a Decepticon would do." Ironhide snarled.

"Of all the toys Matt held on to, why me?" Thundercracker sighed.

"Well, you know where to find me!" T called up to them. "Also, get out of the window. Anyone could see you moving around if they bothered to look."

He turned around and walked back down the street in the same direction they had seen him go with Applejack earlier.

"This seems big." Rainbow Dash remarked. "A kidnapping and ransom."

"That's big city life for you!" Pinkie remarked. "I've got four pieces of paper with the 5 on them, two with the 20, and three on the 10 ones, along with some coins, think that'll be enough?"

* * *

"Gosh darn it! Why is that one ALWAYS the funky one?!" T growled as he fiddled with the last lock and walked inside upon opening it. "Guys, I'm back! Are you still in one piece?"

"Present and accounted for." Applejack called.

"I'm here too!" Derpy added.

"Good; fixing toys isn't cheap, no matter how easy they are to break," T muttered as he walked into the living room.

"Y'want in? I've been teaching Derpy 5-card poker," Applejack offered. "She's... not the best bluffer."

"Well, then it's one-sided either way. I'm not good at bluffing either," T laughed as he noticed their card setup. "But screw it, deal me in."

"I may be smarter and less clumsy than Derpy in the show, but this one can read minds like no tomorrow," Derpy said to him.

"It's not that hard. For example, I bet a million bits you're thinking about muffins right now," T said with a giggle.

"No comment," Derpy replied, knowing she couldn't win that argument.

"Well that's so easy it may as well be cheating." Applejack arched her brow.

"Maybe, but if you want someone to blame for that, blame Hasbro for her personality in the first place. Which I won't," T remarked. They all dealt in their bets and then put their hands down...

"Dang it! I really was hoping you'd buy that!" T growled, showing a crappy hand.

"At least mine had some leverage to it," Derpy noted, showing a full house hand.

"Not bad. You win this round." Applejack remarked, dropping her lousy hand.

"Alright, one more round," T suggested, dealing out another hand to each of them. As soon as he finished, he looked to a watch on his arm, then to a clock hanging on the wall nearby.

"I hope your friends can read, because this is the longest I've had anyone wait to respond to a note I left on the door before," T remarked as he looked at his hand. Another bad one, but he didn't let them know it. Besides, he could still trade and hope for the best.

"Oh..." Derpy got a wide eyed expression as she looked her hand over, then a devious grin lit up her face.

"Johnathan is getting out of class about now, he'll probably see the note in fifteen minutes or so." Applejack said, nonchalantly.

"Fair enough," T nodded. He switched three cards in and Applejack just barely heard him mutter, "Rats!" under his breath. Derpy seemed confident with her hand, so she didn't exchange any cards.

"All right, set 'em down." Applejack said, revealing a pair of nines and a pair of sevens.

"I'm terrible at this game," T groaned as he laid down a dead hand. Derpy then suddenly and unexpectedly groaned as well, laying down one pair of queens.

"You just never give in to the bluffs, do you?" she asked Applejack.

"It's a talent." Applejack chuckled.

"More like a superpower," T chuckled.

"Maybe we should play UNO now," Derpy suggested.

"Sure, if I can find that deck again," T agreed. "One second..."

He stood up and walked over to the clock hanging on the wall, lifted it down and revealed a small shelf hidden behind it. One object on the shelf was an UNO card deck. He took this out, replaced the clock and then sat back down.

"So if'n I recall correctly, this is pretty well crazy eights with another name." Applejack noted.

"Sometimes," T agreed, shuffling the deck and then dealing the cards. "My favorite rule to play on this is the 'jump in' rule."

"Oh, I know that one!" Derpy piped up. "It's the one where if you have a card that matches the one played last, even if it's not your turn you can play that card!"

"Never heard tell of that one, alrighty then." Applejack nodded.

"Okay, let's do this," T said enthusiastically as the game began. "One two, here we go! Uno, don't ya know!"

"He likes to say that all the time," Derpy commented. "And, it looks like I have to draw already... at the start."

"I see..." Applejack nodded, looking to her cards.

"You may wish to be careful on this game. Bluffing can save your life in it just as much as poker can," T commented. As he set down a yellow 7, Derpy, whose turn was before his own, suddenly placed down another yellow 7, thus making it T's turn again.

"Well, that happened," he muttered. "And now, draw."

"Oh well." Appleback chuckled.

"That's two for me, five for AJ, and three for Derpy," T noted, as if keeping score. "All in all, well played."

"Mhm." Applejack nodded, about that time I knocked on the door, I looked down at the paper I found on my door, this was the address, of course looking at the door I felt as if the house had been abandoned for years.

"That's probably them," T said standing up. "Just in case though, stay frozen until I give the all clear or unless you know who it is."

He walked to the door and, after fiddling with the locks a bit, he opened the door. I was there, obviously. And after a quick conversation, Applejack returned home with me. "So, have a nice day?" I asked as I walked down the street with her in my pocket.

"Long, but nice." She noted. "One thing's for sure, never standing on the windowsill on a windy day ever again." She remarked.


End file.
